Insights Into Teens: Episode 31 “Getting to Know You Part 2”

We finish up our two part question and answer session with four new topics. This week we discuss relationships, the future, family and personal values. We gain new insights into the complicated personality that is our co-host and we get what I consider to be the single best answer to the age old question “What is the meaning of life” that I’ve ever heard. It’s a heart warming, educational and entertaining look into the mind of today’s youth.

Insights Into Teens

Transcription

Speaker 1: 00:01 Insightful podcast by informative hopes sites, a podcast network.

Speaker 2: 00:26 .

Speaker 3: 00:26 Welcome to insights into teens, a podcast series, exploring the issues and challenges of today’s youth. Your hosts are Joseph and Madison whale is a father and daughter team making their way through the challenges of the teenage years.

Speaker 2: 00:50

Speaker 4: 00:51 Welcome to insights into teens. This is episode 31 getting to know you. Part two. I’m your host, Joseph Whalen and my lovely and talented cohost Madison Waylon. Hi everyone. How are you doing today, Maddie? Hey, good. So today we are finishing up a two part series. We started last week. We are going through a series of questions that were developed by a clinical psychologist, Dr Kristy Wolf. And this week we’ve got four different categories we’re going to be going through. Okay. We have relationships, the future family and personal values. And we’ve got, I think we’ve got about 36 questions this week, so a few less than last week. Okay. So any questions, input, or anecdotes you’d want to share before we get into it?

Speaker 5: 01:54 Mm,

Speaker 4: 01:55 Not so much, Huh? Not really. Okay. And let’s get right into it. So the first category that we’re going to be going into is relationships. And the first question that we have here is, do your friends have boyfriends or girlfriends? Like are any of your friends that you’re you associate with now? Are they in relationships? No, I don’t think so. That is that. Do you think that’s unusual? Are there other kids in your, in your grade that are in relationships that you don’t usually associate with?

Speaker 4: 02:36 I mean, I hear drama about it, but they’ve never, the relationships never lasted long than I know of. So there are little, little, you know, forays into relationships and stuff. Yeah. But I, what I know of my friends aren’t dating. Okay. And if put things in a context, you know, you’re almost 13, your friends are generally your age, a year or two younger than you. So it’s still kind of early for the dating stuff. So some of these questions may not be entirely valid from our, our audience, but we’ll go through them anyway. So question number two is, what do you think makes a healthy relationship?

Speaker 6: 03:19 Well, if both, if the to people have fallen in love. I think honesty, trust and compassion, what was both of them would make a good relationship. And I’m not gonna say specific genders because I know in the fee, I know now that we can, we can like whichever gender we want and we can be whichever gender we want

Speaker 4: 03:50 Right now. I would add sort of a caveat to that, that at your age, you know, in your teen years a lot of the relationships that, that kid your age run into are less about the falling in love stuff and more about trying to find who you are, what you like, who you like. So a lot of times some of the relationships that you get into are less about love and more about the kind of people you want to hang around with and things tend to develop from there. Yeah. later on in life when you’re looking at getting married and settling down and maybe having kids and you’re looking for a longterm partner, then you start getting more into the falling in love type scenarios. Okay. So just to put that into perspective, so question two, and I already know the answer to this one, but I’ll ask anyway. Do you have a girlfriend or boyfriend? Nope. No, you don’t. And, and I’m perfectly okay with that. Just for the record. Yeah. No. So we’ll move on from there. What do you think of the qualities you would look for in someone you’d want to date and there we’re not talking, falling in love and getting married. We’re just talking about somebody that you’d want to date.

Speaker 6: 05:14 Well, I’d like us I wouldn’t like start off immediately. I would like look to be friends and basically what I see, you know, what everyone should probably know what I see in a friend. Those are basically the same qualities I would see in someone I was dating. And that’s pretty much

Speaker 4: 05:39 Some of those qualities. Like give us some examples.

Speaker 6: 05:44 Trust, honesty, the ones I said before. Also just being a good friend basically.

Speaker 4: 05:53 Yeah. Like do you wants something you can hang out with and talk to and have fun with? Yeah, basically. And when you started dating, that’s really what you’re going to be looking at more than anything else. It’s, you know, I’m going to be hanging out with this person. What activities do we enjoy? What movies do we like, what music do we listen to, what common interests that we have? And that drives most of the relationship qualities that you look for at this age. And those evolve over time though. So that brings us to question five. Is there anyone, and you don’t have to name names, but is there anyone that you have a crush on? Nope. No. Yes. Do not shake your head, sweetheart. This is an audio recording too, so the listener listeners can’t hear you. Shake your head.

Speaker 7: 06:45 Gee, thanks.

Speaker 4: 06:48 Okay. So you don’t, you do not have a crush on anyone right now? Nope. Okay. The next question, and we’ll expound on this one in a, in a future podcast that we’re actually prepping right now, is do you know anyone who is LGBTQ? Yes, I do. Okay. And for the, for the audience sake, we’ll just say that, you know, LGBTQ is lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer in this case. But we will expound on that in what I hope will be greater, much greater detail later in the month of September. Questions seven. Does anyone, those, that you know, you know, reflecting on the last question, does anyone treat them differently that you notice? Nope, they don’t. Okay, that’s good. And I think the, the impetus for this question here is because for the longest time and things are starting to change now for the positive, which is good, but for the longest time people that were not considered heterosexual were ostracized. They were not accepted. Even now in certain circles, namely like the Catholic Church, they’re very much looked down upon for reasons that are not valid. And often not fully understood. But again, we’ll get into that stuff in the any episodes we’re going to do later on. How old do you think you have to be to fall in love? Well maybe one year.

Speaker 7: 08:49 I think the time you should start dating would be around 16 at least that’s what you tell me. Okay. Age I should,

Speaker 6: 08:56 But if you want to fall in love, I’d recommend at least 20.

Speaker 4: 09:00 Okay. Maybe. Yeah, sometimes. Unfortunately you, you can’t help when you fall in love. Yeah. It’s sort of one of those natural things that happens that you don’t have much control over. Yeah. Like when Mommy and I first met, you know, she might dispute this, but in a way I kinda think it was love at first sight when the two of us met the first time. It is, it’s been that way ever since. So you never know. You never know. What about getting married? How old do you think you should be to get married?

Speaker 6: 09:39 Well, I’m pretty, well, I’d say at least 30, 30, just a little. Like if you want to get married, I would recommend getting a good one, a good household to have a steady relationship and three enough money to support yourself and possibly your lover.

Speaker 4: 09:57 And I think that’s brilliant. I think that’s a very good idea. And I think a lot of young couples these days tend to get married very early. And they’re not established, you know, you’ve, they’ve not finished their schooling. They don’t have stable jobs. And probably the biggest strain I think you would ever see on relationships, especially marriages, tends to be finances. So if, if you wait until your, your late twenties, early thirties, you could probably get yourself set up in a way that you don’t have those financial burdens that are on the relationship. So that’s it for relationships. When we come back we’ll talk about the future.

Speaker 8: 10:47 Okay.

Speaker 4: 10:52 So the future, we only have a few questions here and that’s mainly because I’m not clairvoyant and can’t predict the future yet. So question nine, and these are sort of kind of fun questions. Question nine is if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?

Speaker 6: 11:10 I guess I go to Tokyo. Japan.

Speaker 4: 11:17 So you, like, you’ve mentioned this in the past. What is your fascination with Tokyo?

Speaker 6: 11:22 Well, I know, I, I just feel like it would be cool to go and see. I know there are some might be some historical things that I could learn about it. I also learned about it in social studies last year okay. And plus there’s Tokyo Disneyland. Yeah. Yes

Speaker 4: 11:42 There is. We can’t get away from Disney. Nope. Now your artwork that you do, the style that you tend to draw in is very reminiscent of anime. It’s sort of like an offshoot of that. Yeah. Is it, is that part of the draw the culture of, of Tokyo and the artwork there?

Speaker 9: 12:01 I mean I do like the artwork and I would be interested to see if there was someone who was able to draw anime. Cause honestly I like Anna Mae. It’s just, I haven’t really been able to draw and Umay as well as they do because my aunt an amaze more in a cute style. They’re an amaze. Just somewhat more realistic.

Speaker 4: 12:27 Okay. Okay. But, but that is part of the draw of wanting to go there though. Yeah. Cool. A number 10, this is a big question that a lot of people really just can’t answer at certain stages in their life, but what is your goal in life?

Speaker 9: 12:46 I guess to finish school with a good education. Eventually go to a good college afterwards, get a job in either technology or engineering and maybe if if I ever, if this ever happens, settle down with someone.

Speaker 4: 13:08 Okay. I think they’re all very realistic and obtainable goals and they’re smart goals too. And I think that’s the important thing. You don’t have this and there’s nothing wrong with these ambitious goals of I want to be an actress or I want to be a professional football player. Some people still have to have those goals, but obtaining those as is much more difficult and obtaining what your goals are, your goals kind of line up in a linear format, which is makes it easier to obtain those. What do you hope your life will be like 10 years from now?

Speaker 9: 13:47 Well if we’re thinking about it logistically, I’d be, I’d be 22. I’d have graduated from high school and I would maybe still be in college. I have no idea how the logistics work I made like

Speaker 4: 14:04 Depends on if you’re going for a higher level degree you would be. Yeah.

Speaker 9: 14:08 Yeah. But I might go for the higher level degree. I might and I might have like gotten a job to help to help pay for college friends and stuff.

Speaker 4: 14:20 Yeah. Cause Mommy and daddy are going to put that burden entirely on you. You’re paying for all of it. Yeah.

Speaker 9: 14:24 Oh my God. Just to help with it. And I mean I might actually be finishing college in 10 years. I have no idea.

Speaker 4: 14:33 You might be. And that would be right around the time that you would be finishing it too.

Speaker 9: 14:37 Yeah. So I’d be about to finish college and hopefully find a job, hopefully find a job in engineering or technology.

Speaker 4: 14:48 What kind of job would you would want? What’s your ideal job?

Speaker 6: 14:53 I honestly don’t really know. I mean, you and mommy work and engineering and technology years.

Speaker 4: 15:00 Mommy works more in logistics. I work in technology. Yeah. But like is your ambition to like, I don’t know, work for NASA or, or build bridges or something like that?

Speaker 6: 15:12 I was able to work for NASA. I would because it’s just cool and I’m sort of a science nerd. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 4: 15:21 But like is that what you, you looking to do? Is that, is it that type of engineering?

Speaker 6: 15:27 I mean, I’m not really sure. I mean you also talked about how my, my love of art could go in with some and some engineering where like designing buildings. Yeah.

Speaker 4: 15:40 Could you could, you could put the two of those together and become an architect. Yeah. I think that would work too. Cool.

Speaker 6: 15:47 Yeah. I still have no real goal on which job I will get, but I’m still looking for something in either engineering or technology.

Speaker 4: 15:57 And you know what, at this stage there, it’s impossible to really set your sights on one specific role. Yeah. I think the idea of achieving the general skills right now needed to go into technology and engineering is enough to direct you in where you need to go right now. And as you progressed through high school, you’ll find tune that a little bit more. Okay. Here’s a whimsical question for you. If you had $1,000 to spend, how would you spend it today? It’s not much of a future question, but how would you spend it today?

Speaker 6: 16:32 Well, I help pay off rent from the house. Rarely would $1,000. We don’t rent. We own the house. By the way, Judge Morgan help with the mortgage. If I had any money left over

Speaker 4: 16:47 Dollars, there’s not that much. Yeah. So how would you spend it on you? I appreciate your, your generosity, but we got the we’ve got the mortgage covered. I had help pay college funds. You’re not in college yet. Don’t you save, don’t you save for college though? No, no. We, we do everything on the fly. No. For Yourself, if you could spend $1,000 today on yourself, how would you spend it?

Speaker 6: 17:21 I’d probably

Speaker 2: 17:24 Really?

Speaker 6: 17:28 It’s only a thousand bucks. I know. And you’re just on a big spenders that yeah, you don’t want it.

Speaker 4: 17:39 I’m not, you’re not cheap. You’re frugal. Frugal. I’m frugal. Yeah. You know, I’m frugal. Right. But if you, if there was one thing in the world that you would want to spend that you can get for $1,000 in less, what would it be? The ginger cat. A ginger cat. Okay. Interesting. And the last question or series or questions, depending on how you answered the first one, is, would you ever get a tattoo? Mm.

Speaker 6: 18:09 I mean, if it was to honor something or someone, I would, but on the fly right now,

Speaker 4: 18:17 I don’t think so. Yeah. I’m with you. I’m not big like, like I don’t have a problem with tattoos or people that have tattoos and neither do I just, I don’t, I it, they, it doesn’t appeal to me to turn my body into a canvas like that. So, but more power to those who can take the pain of the needle, so. Okay. Well I guess that shuts down the followup questions to that then. Thank you so much. Yeah, that’ll close out this category of the future. When we come back, we’ll talk about family. I get the pat myself on the back of lot.

Speaker 8: 18:50 No.

Speaker 4: 18:56 So who do you like most? Mere mom. No, that’s not really actually question.

Speaker 6: 19:01 Oh my God, Daddy. I know that’s not a question I go through one Oprah.

Speaker 4: 19:06 What do you like most about me? And I’ll bounce this back and forth between Mommy and I.

Speaker 6: 19:14 I like the fact of you’re interested in history and the fact that you’ll help me. Whenever I have trouble in any thing. Even though math is hard,

Speaker 4: 19:27 Math is hard.

Speaker 6: 19:29 I also like the fact that you’re compassionate and will listen to me with never I have problems

Speaker 4: 19:34 Or whenever your model log

Speaker 6: 19:36 Well, whenever I hangs up or whenever I have anxiety

Speaker 4: 19:39 Over that too. Okay, good answers. Oh, this one I’ll, I’ll, I’ll ask you about Molly. What would you change about mommy? She’s going to get mad that I painted the room.

Speaker 6: 19:56 Let’s see. I she’s a compassionate mom. She’s so listen to me with my brother and mother. Just get it to her. I know. I’m thinking

Speaker 4: 20:12 I would change the way she reacts to this question.

Speaker 6: 20:16 I guess I would, if I had to change something, I would change the fact that she just always pokes his dick in my cage.

Speaker 4: 20:25 Oh, both of us do that.

Speaker 6: 20:26 Yeah. I would change the way I would want you guys to start poking six of my cage for you. Kind of do it a little funnier. Oh well I try. I just don’t tell mommy that. Oh well cause she won’t listen to this podcast. Right? Yeah. Let’s just hope don’t say anything.

Speaker 4: 20:43 Well here, do you want mommy to do, you don’t want mommy to hear. So let’s turn the question back around a little bit here and let me ask, what do you like, what do you think I like most about you?

Speaker 6: 20:56 The fact that I’m intelligent and that I’m a good artist.

Speaker 4: 21:01 Yeah. They, they are very good things to like about you. And what do you think I would change a value? The fact that I ha that I hardly make any friends. Well yeah, that would be, that would be a good thing. That change. Yeah. And the fact of my ass lettuces them. Man, I really care too much about that. Yeah. I didn’t really think it would. Yeah. Now I’d like you to be able to make friends a little bit easier. I think it would make your life a little bit easier. And you’d like me to stop worrying about middle school? Yes. Well, I’d like you to stop worrying about things in general. You tend to overreact. Yeah. You swamp yourself and anxiety when it’s one of these things where you really just sorta, you kind of have to take things in stride. So I’ll take things seriously, but, you know, don’t, don’t get yourself upset over them. Question a, what are we 18? What is something you wish I would do more often?

Speaker 4: 22:02 Well, actually let’s change that so we don’t do all the negative ones and money. What is something you wish mommy would do more often?

Speaker 4: 22:11 Let’s say something I want mommy to do more often.

Speaker 4: 22:19 I’d like her to, Oh my God, I would like her to, oh my God, you’d like it. Oh my God.

Speaker 4: 22:37 Well here’s the so hard no, it was the seem pretty straight forward when we went through the list earlier. I know. You’re killing me. Just pick something I guess. Okay. Will you watch maybe like have more fun activities with me. Okay. That’s it. That’s a good cop. I like that one there. What would you like me to do less often?

Speaker 4: 23:08 Make dad jokes. If your dad jokes I lose. Make them funny. Well, there they are. Funny to me. It’s all about perspective. Cape Cod was funny. It’s not my fault. You didn’t know where Cape Cod was. Oh my God. Look it’s not my fault that I don’t know either. Either view to tendon, right. We didn’t, we didn’t educate you about Cape Cod. I’m terribly sorry. We’ll start doing geography lessons next week. Question 20. Do you feel comfortable talking to me about anything? Yep. Anything? Yup. Literally anything. Pretty much. Okay, good. Was An easy question. Question 21, what can I do to make you feel more comfortable?

Speaker 9: 23:58 I think you’re pretty much now. Now the Ha net.

Speaker 4: 24:03 Yeah. Nailed the head on that one. Yep. Yep. The mail and Ed hit the nail on the head on that one. Oh. Does that make any sense? That does. Yes. Hitting the head on the nail doesn’t cause that takes a lot of town. So what do you mean by that though?

Speaker 9: 24:21 Like I think you guys made it made me pretty comfortable already talking about everything. You have a good system where you at? Like I have to base the day off of a word. Sometimes I say tolerable. Sometimes I say awful. Sometimes I say pretty good. That kind of stuff.

Speaker 4: 24:43 So we sort of make you rate the day pretty much and then we talk. If it’s a bad rating then we talk about why it’s a bad rating. Yup. Okay. If it’s a good rating, sometimes you want to hear why was a good rating, I’ll buy. That kind of makes sense. A question 22 how do you think your friends, family relationships compare to ours? Do they have similar relationships? Do they talk, do they do the same types of things?

Speaker 9: 25:08 Well, I don’t know if I think I’m gonna, I don’t know if they talk about their problems. It’s not my business, it’s their personal life. Sure. But I do think they are somewhat of a strong relationship with their parents.

Speaker 4: 25:22 Okay. Well that’s good. Do you think they are closer or more distant than we are as a family?

Speaker 9: 25:33 I mean I definitely think my friends have good relationships with their parents. I wouldn’t I mean they might be like a tiny bit more distant than us cause I, I don’t really know. I just feel like somehow there’s small, a small amount more distant than .

Speaker 4: 25:54 Well, cause they don’t do, you know, podcasts where they do penetrating questions and answer sessions. Wow. Daddy, I’m just saying, you know, how many of your comedy, your friends do podcasts? None. None. See that’s how cool we are. I did want to ask a follow up question on here. Do any of your kids in a single parent household or any of your friends in a single parent household?

Speaker 5: 26:21 Oh, not

Speaker 9: 26:23 That I know of. I think they’re all in two parent households. Okay. Some have siblings

Speaker 4: 26:32 Cause I can understand how, how that can certainly have an effect on . Yeah. Yeah. So a question 23, is there anything you wish our family would do together more often? Go to Dave and busters. Go to d. That’s expensive, man. You really need to, you want a good day busters? You need to start footing the bill for it. Oh Shit. But okay. I can see that. We do have a lot of fun there. Yep. Question 24, do you think the discipline in our family is fair? Yes, I do. Is there anything that you would change about it?

Speaker 6: 27:16 I don’t think so. You both have a good way to discipline me. Like one of the beatings will continue until morale improves. Oh my God. You do not hit me. You’ve never don’t, you’ve never hit me before. Exactly. I mean, you might’ve hit me with like a stuffed animal or something, but that’s it.

Speaker 4: 27:34 Yeah. Well, you know, you gotta use the soft stuff. Yeah. so we’re not overly strict with you then. Nope. What describe what some of the discipline is that we use for you.

Speaker 6: 27:47 Like whenever I make a mistake, you guys talk about it with may we talk over about the mistake and eventually I learned my lesson and not do it again.

Speaker 4: 27:56 Yeah. Well, and that’s a thing. I mean the discipline is determined by the recipient. So if you do something wrong and we implement, you know, a passive discipline with just a talk or something and the problem doesn’t resurface, then there is no need to take that discipline any further at that point in time. And fortunately, you know, with the talks that we have with you’re very effective and you’re very receptive

Speaker 6: 28:25 And plus the fact, I always worry that I’m going to make the same mistake again and the fact that I really don’t want to make the same mistake again and just the, my anxiety gets the best of me.

Speaker 4: 28:33 Yeah. And what happens is, is you tend to be far harder on yourself in those situations than mommy or daddy are. So it saves us from, from really having to crack down. We just sort of kind of have to point out some of the mistakes to you and nudge you in the right direction and give you, take the guidance and go. So as parents, mommy and daddy are very fortunate, you know, that you’re that receptive and that is what we have for family. We will come back and finish up with values.

Speaker 8: 29:05 Okay.

Speaker 4: 29:10 So earlier on in the year we did an entire episode, an entire podcast on spring holidays, religious holidays. So this question sort of springboards on that. So question 25 is do you believe in God?

Speaker 6: 29:30 I guess so.

Speaker 4: 29:31 And why is that?

Speaker 6: 29:36 I’m pretty sure everyone believes in some type of God and except

Speaker 4: 29:41 Atheist

Speaker 9: 29:43 Atheists don’t believe in God. Yeah. but I’m not that religious right to say.

Speaker 4: 29:52 Okay. So if you do believe in God as you say you do, how do you picture God? Like what do you think he or she looks like?

Speaker 9: 30:01 I think it, I think he would look like you’d have, for some reason, I’ve been imaging this for a while. He might have a white robe. He have a beard similar to yours and you would have like a poofy white haircut.

Speaker 4: 30:22 So the, the typical Zeus, like God with a beard, white hair and wearing a toga and stuff like that. Yeah. Stuff like that. Very traditional image of it. And one that’s ironically enough passed down to us from non-Christian or non monotheistic, a creation stories. You know, they go all the way back to the Greek gods, you know, that’s how they pictured Zeus and, and the other gods like that. So that’s kind of interesting. What do you think happens after death?

Speaker 9: 31:05 I don’t like to their eyes and on occasions, but I guess now I kind of have to, I guess after death you’re might like, it’d be like falling asleep and then eventually you’d meet. Like if we’re looking at it realistically, it’s like a forever lasting sleep or if you want to theorize on it, maybe you wake up and you’re eventually in heaven seeing all, seeing all of your relatives who have passed away.

Speaker 4: 31:38 So you do have a belief in an afterlife then? Somewhat. Okay. And that’s fine. I mean we don’t need to go into any more detail than that. Yeah, please know it’s going to make me feel weird. Do you think there is one best religion? Like all right, so let’s, let’s step back a second here and, and thing you’ve got western religion and then you’ve got eastern religion. Yeah. And you’ve probably not had much exposure to any eastern religions like a Hindu, Buddhism and so forth. But from a western religion standpoint, we celebrate Jewish holidays, we celebrate some Christian holidays. But the other major religion in the West is Islam. I know you’ve had minimal experience or minimal exposure to that.

Speaker 9: 32:31 Yeah. But I did learn about it in social studies along with Buddhism and all the other religions.

Speaker 4: 32:37 Okay, good. So it was being as well as you are. Do you think there is one religion that’s better than another understanding that Christianity, Judaism, and Islam really stem from the scene origins, the same belief system. So do you think one is better than another? No. And why is that?

Speaker 9: 33:01 I just feel as though if you think, if you know what religion you want to be, I just say like, you’re allowed to believe in what you believe in. If in what you want to believe in, you shouldn’t be forced to do one because the ruler thinks it’s a better religion than any of the others. You should have the choice of your own religion and you shouldn’t have someone else controlling it for you. I don’t think any religion is better than another because I mean, three of the main religions were all started from one.

Speaker 4: 33:38 Right. So let me expound on that just for a minute and ask, what do you think people should look for or do look for when they’re looking for a religious experience or a belief system?

Speaker 9: 33:54 Well, I honestly don’t have too much disposer with, I have never really had to choose my religion. I would just say like, look for something you believe in and look for the religion that suits you best, I guess.

Speaker 4: 34:08 Okay, that works. So question 29 is really a mystery question of the universe. Now, if you’re a fan of the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy, the answer to this is 47, but I’m curious what your answer is. What do you think is the meaning of life?

Speaker 9: 34:31 That’s a big question. Yeah, it’s a really big one. Like the meaning of, so the meaning of life.

Speaker 9: 34:41 I’d say there is no real meeting. There’s many things you can do in your life and you can choose what you want to do as long. Well, yeah, so like there’s no real answer to the question because the meat, you control the meaning of your life. You get to choose what you want to do. Choose what you want to like, choose when you want a dislike. Choose what food you like to showed for you. Dislike, choose your job. Choose like, choose like what college or school you want to go to and choose if you want to help the world or potentially be a threat. And yet you can choose what you want to do. The meaning of life is all dependent on you. You don’t let anyone else decide your life for you. Basically you live your life. The meaning of life is living it. You can basically just do whatever you really want to do and choose what you like and dislike. You don’t have to base it off of anything. The meaning of life. You don’t really have to like, there’s no real answer. The answers are just infinite.

Speaker 4: 36:03 Wow. I have to tell you, that’s a hell of an answer. That is an answer that I think is far more mature than your age suggests and I have to commend you for that. Thank you. I’m impressed. Moving on. Do you think adults automatically deserve respect?

Speaker 9: 36:35 Depend on what they’ve done.

Speaker 4: 36:37 Okay. Let’s say you just met someone on the street or you just figured, okay, you’re going into school to start a new school. You meet your first teacher. Don’t know anything about them, don’t know their name, nothing. Do you think they deserve respect?

Speaker 9: 36:52 Oh yes, because one, they’re providing you with hopefully a good education and two, they’re actually willing to do it.

Speaker 4: 37:00 So you think based on your interaction and the role that they serve in your life would determine if they deserve respect?

Speaker 9: 37:09 Well, as long as they don’t, they haven’t committed anything, any crimes or

Speaker 4: 37:17 I’ll give you another for instance. So we go over to Dave and busters in Philadelphia on a regular basis and one of the pads that we take getting there takes us on this little transition to 95 north to get there. And in that transition period, when we go from the bridge to the highway, there’s oftentimes homeless folks there that are panhandling to try to get money. Do you think they deserve respect?

Speaker 9: 37:45 Well, yes. They’re actually trying to survive. Like if they’re trying to like get money, it means they’re trying to like find a way to live. Because if they’re homeless and have no money, if they don’t get money, then probably more than likely gonna die.

Speaker 4: 38:06 Okay. So let me ask you another, for instance, we go to Walmart to shop for groceries and we go to checkout and the cashier’s checking you out. Do you think the cashier deserves respect?

Speaker 9: 38:20 Well, I mean, I know there’s like, so take for instance, my brother he has, he works at Walmart even though even though he’s still in college, he, he needs to get the extra money. I think the cast year should deserve some respect because he’s trying to get the money so he can provide for his family. Cause you gotta think about other people’s lives as well. If you want to think of someone who deserves respect, like I think the dude should disturb, deserve respect because even if he’s just like some teenager trying to get a job or something, he should still deserves respect so he can, because he wants to provide money and help either his family or him to have a better life.

Speaker 4: 39:11 So it sounds like in general, adults deserve respect and unless they’ve committed crimes, yes. Okay. I think that’s probably a fairly realistic moral compass to go by there. Now let me switch the question up and say, do kids deserve respect?

Speaker 9: 39:35 Like I said, certain kids. Okay. I definitely think kids who aren’t spoiled brats should be, should deserve respect. Okay. Kids are spoiled brats. Not really sure that I’m not really sure they deserve respect.

Speaker 4: 39:53 And you know what, to a certain extent, I largely agree to what you’re saying. The way that I’ve conducted myself in life is that everyone deserves a certain level of respect just out of human decency. Yeah. Okay. And respect is like Karen Z. It’s like money. Okay. So you, you’re given a certain allowance and depending on what your actions are dictates how you spend or earn respect. So for instance, everyone gets $10 in respect and if you do things that are positive and uplifting and for the greater good, then you can earn more, more of that respect. You can earn more money there. Yeah. So you have the opportunity for me to respect you more, but if you do things like lie, cheat and steal you, you spend that respect and you squander what respect you do have. Yeah. And your respect, value diminishes. That’s kind of how I look at things.

Speaker 9: 41:00 Yeah. I’d, I definitely agree with your system. Okay. Like everyone has equal respect from the start. If you do positive things, you get more respect. If you do negative things, you get less respect.

Speaker 4: 41:14 So that, that’s a very good lead into the next question. So question 31 is how do you earn respect? How does someone earn your respect?

Speaker 9: 41:21 Well if like, like as long as they don’t do anything completely horrible, like the things you said like cheat, steal stuff that, and if they show positive feedback, like friendliness, honesty, trust, then I would say they earned more respect.

Speaker 4: 41:42 I think that’s a very good outlook. Question 32 is another big one. If you could, how would you change the world?

Speaker 9: 41:54 I would try to my best to make peace on the world. I hate the fact that we’re all still fighting first, like just reasons and I just want it to stop. I just hate the thought. I hate the thought of war and I don’t want any more outbreaks like that because not only does it not help the soldiers fighting in the war, but I’m pretty sure if there are any pedestrians near there or people near there, it would have greatly impacted their lives as well. Because sure. Like we were in this one time when we were doing ELA and we were learning, we were actually reading a story about a girl

Speaker 4: 42:40 Being the English language arts class.

Speaker 9: 42:43 Yes. And basically there was this little girl who was reading a diary similar to Anne Frank. She was basically writing it because she was an in her childhood. There was war going on in her home in her where she lived and it was hard for her to live as during war. Like it was basically, it basically took away her childhood.

Speaker 4: 43:11 Yeah. Okay. Okay. I appreciate that perspective. A question 32 is a SAR, 33 is, do you think it’s ever okay to lie?

Speaker 8: 43:24 Mm.

Speaker 9: 43:25 On certain occasions. Give me an example. Like if someone worked really hard on something, they asked you if you like it but you don’t, but you don’t want to hurt their feelings, I would definitely say then you can lie because it lifts their spirits and I definitely think even though you’re lying, it’s not, it’s like a little white lie. It. I know you should be honest, but if they worked really hard on it and they’re really proud of it and they really want support, then I would definitely say just a little white lie.

Speaker 4: 44:04 So a little white lies like, you know, does this shirt make me look fat? And you say no. Yeah, it’s your fat that makes you look fat.

Speaker 9: 44:14 Hi Daddy.

Speaker 4: 44:16 I get the point. I know what you’re saying. A question number 34. Who Do you look up to?

Speaker 9: 44:26 You and mommy.

Speaker 4: 44:27 That’s long cause I’m six foot four. Why do you look up to us?

Speaker 9: 44:33 Well, you both good role models. You both, you have both worked hard, you both worked hard to get where you are in life now you both have good jobs and you both provide a good and healthy life and a good and healthy life for me.

Speaker 4: 44:53 Okay. And yes, for the record, I am fishing for compliments at this point. Let’s see, 35. Who Do you think looks up to you?

Speaker 9: 45:05 Mm, I assume I say some of my friends who are younger than I am.

Speaker 4: 45:13 Okay. And why do you think they look up to you?

Speaker 9: 45:17 I’m not trying to toot my own horn, but

Speaker 4: 45:20 Hey, why not? I’m going fishing for compliments this whole time.

Speaker 9: 45:24 I could be considered a good role model.

Speaker 4: 45:27 Okay. I think you could tell and I think part of it’s the fact that you’re older, but I think a large part is because you exhibit the qualities of leadership and role model that a lot of kids look up to and, and you have good judgment. And I think that’s very important. Question 36 and the last question for this category and today what do you think are the three most important traits a person could have?

Speaker 9: 46:04 I’d go with kindness, honesty, and some respect for others,

Speaker 4: 46:12 Some retrospect or some respect. Respect. So kindness. What was the third one? Second one. Honesty, honesty, and respect towards others as a respect for them. Fortunately, good memory was not in there because I couldn’t even remember that list to begin with.

Speaker 9: 46:30 Yeah. I honestly don’t mind if people don’t have good memories.

Speaker 4: 46:36 Good. Cause I don’t know why. So they are very three very good qualities and I think they, they are good touch points on whether or not you, a person’s a good person or not. So that’s it for the questions. We will come back, we will get your final thoughts and any shout outs that you might have. So go for closing remarks and shout out.

Speaker 9: 47:06 Alrighty. So I guess I’ll talk since we were talking about family today, I’ll briefly go about family. I’d definitely say I think you should be, people should be close to the ones they care about. And you should always remember that no matter how bad your family be, they’re still trying to look out for you. I know it’s not the case for every family, but for most families, and please don’t end up being a bad person. Don’t end up lying, cheating or stealing. Please try your best to be a good person. And if you are, it’ll come out in your favor to have a good life later on.

Speaker 4: 47:56 Okay. And he shall L’s Today.

Speaker 9: 48:00 I guess I’ll give a shout out to you and Mommy for being such good parents. And also to you for organizing the podcast for us, because I definitely think it helped me mature more than I did before we did the podcast.

Speaker 4: 48:15 Awesome. Well, thank you very much. I think that is it for today. And we’ll be back next week with a another great podcast.

Speaker 9: 48:27 Bye everyone.

Show Notes

  • Introductions
    • Insights Into Teens: Episode 28 “Getting to know you Part 1”
    • This is a two part series offering a deeper dive into Maddie’s personality using a series of conversation starter questions posted by Licensed Clinical Psychologist Doctor Kristi Wolfe
  • Categories
    • Relationships
    • The Future
    • Family
    • Personal Values
       
  • Questions
    1. Do your friends have boyfriends/girlfriends?
    2. What makes a healthy relationship?
    3. Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?
    4. What are the qualities you would look for in someone you want to date?
    5. Is there anyone you have a crush on?
    6. Do you know anyone who’s LGBTQ?
    7. Does anyone treat them differently? What do you think about that?
    8. How old do you think you have to be to fall in love? What about get married?

      Future:
    9. If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?
    10. What is your goal in life?
    11. What do you hope your life will be like 10 years from now?
    12. If you had $1000 to spend, how would you spend it?
    13. Would you ever get a tattoo? Why or why not? What would it be?

      Family:
    14. What do you like most about me/your other parent/siblings?
    15. What would you change about me/ other parent/ sibling?
    16. What do you think I like most about you?
    17. What do you think I would change about you?
    18. What is something you wish I would do more often?
    19. Less often?
    20. Do you feel comfortable talking to me about anything?
    21. What could I do to make you feel more comfortable?
    22. How do you think your friends’ family relationships compare to ours? Are they closer/more distant? Why do you think that?
    23. Is there anything you wish our family would do together more often?
    24. Do you think the discipline in our family is fair? What would you change?

      Values:
    25. Do you believe in God? Why or why not?
    26. If so, how do you picture God?
    27. What do you think happens after death?
    28. Do you think there is one best religion?
    29. What do you think is the meaning of life?
    30. Do adults automatically deserve respect? Do kids?
    31. How do people earn respect?
    32. How would you change the world if you could?
    33. Do you think it’s ever okay to lie? What kinds of situations?
    34. Who do you look up to? Why?
    35. Who do you think looks up to you?
    36. What do you think are the three most important traits a person could have?

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