Insights Into Teens: Episode 16 “Role Models”

This week we take our third and final stab at role models. Having two unsuccessful attempts at this subject we redoubled our research efforts to come back with a much more robust discussion on a very important aspect of not only teen lives but everyone in general. We very clearly define what we consider role models, we talk about the traits often embodied in our role models. We then take a look at the positive effects that role models have on us before a brief question and answer session on Madison’s views on role models. As always we wrap with Madison’s closing remarks and shoutouts.

Insights Into Teens

Transcript

Speaker 1:
0:02
Insightful pocket by informative post insights into a podcast network.:
Speaker 2:
0:26
Welcome to insights into teens, a podcast series, exploring the issues and challenges of today’s youth. Your hosts are Joseph and Madison whale is a father and daughter team making their way through the challenges of the teenage years.:
Speaker 4:
0:52
Welcome to insights into teens. This is episode 16 role models. I’m your host, Joseph Waylon and my lovely and talented cohost Madison Waylon. Everyone are you doing today? Maddie? Pretty good. So, uh, just right off the bat here, full disclosure, this is actually the third time that we’ve tried to do this topic on a podcast. Uh, and we’ve not met with much success in the past. [inaudible] so you should be well practiced on this topic at this point in time. Uh, I did go back and do some additional research because we were lacking in material and uh, hopefully we can knock it out of the park this time. That’s ops. So, so, uh, we’ll do a quick rundown. We will be doing a rather lengthy definition of what a role model is, a which I think part of our failures in the past have been a lack of definition. Then we’ll talk about what the qualities of a positive role model are, the effects of positive role models on teens. Um, then I reserved a portion at the end to do a question and answer session real quick just in case we didn’t cover all the, all the information, all the aspects that you had on role models. And then of course we’ll finish up with our closing remarks and Hower shout outs. So are you ready?:
Speaker 5:
2:24
Sure.:
Speaker 4:
2:30
So we start off today with our definition of a role model. Uh, this particular definition comes from study.com and it says a role model is a person other people look up to in order to help determine appropriate behaviors. Role models can be either positive or negative. Positive role models offer a range of helpful and useful behaviors, negative role models. On the other hand, offer examples of harmful or disruptive behaviors. Virtually anyone can be a role model, but in western culture, publicly visible figures such as athletes, actors, musicians, and celebrities are are the most common examples of Romos other common role models including members of the clergy, police officers and parents. Most of these people can be considered either negative or positive role models depending on their behaviors. Figures like drug dealers and gang members can be considered almost exclusively negative because of the behaviors they display as the sample suggest. Visibility plays an important part in making someone a role model. The most visible examples like athletes or actors involved, individuals for whom public visibility is part of the job. Since many people can observe these individuals’ behaviors, it is likely people will imitate, imitate, I’m sorry, imitate their behaviors and attitudes. While people of all ages may have role models, it’s generally young people who are still developing their own identities, who try so hard to emulate their role models. Very lengthy definition of what a role model is.:
Speaker 6:
4:17
Yep. I can definitely tell that’s very, it’s actually quite long.:
Speaker 4:
4:20
Okay. So I think we’ve, we’ve really will define what a role model is in this case here. So in moving through the rest of the podcast, I’d like you to keep this very well defined definition in mind.:
Speaker 5:
4:36
Okay.:
Speaker 4:
4:41
So the qualities of a positive role model. And I’m going to give you these one at a time and I want to get your thoughts on each of them and see what you think about them. Okay. Now this comes from a website called livestrong.com and again, all the links are available in the credits at the end of the podcast. So the first quality is moral and they describe moral as a good role model as high moral values. Research found that children respect those who practice what they preach, role models who support worthwhile causes and who are willing to act on their beliefs, help children develop and strengthen their own values. Role models, behave ethically and demonstrate honesty. So what are your thoughts on the morality side of role models?:
Speaker 6:
5:29
I definitely sent the morality is a good quality for a good role model because I’m in school, we have, we watch CNN term for and take notes on it. And occasionally there would be like a CNN hero who would do something good for um, the community, like helping feed poor people, helping children get into good foster homes who have terrible parents, right? It’s goes or no parents, no parents. And I can definitely see like younger kids always looking up to them, always wanting to be honest and they can definitely see being, having good moral is a good quality for being a role model.:
Speaker 4:
6:16
So can you think of anyone who you know right at this moment who demonstrates this? Quality? Friends, family, anyone?:
Speaker 6:
6:28
Well, I definitely think you guys contribute.:
Speaker 4:
6:31
Gotcha. Okay. And what did, let me ask you this. We had an event that we went to today. What did we go to this morning that was for mommy?:
Speaker 6:
6:40
Um, when you went to her heart walk at Ocean city,:
Speaker 4:
6:45
right? So this was a five mile walk that mommy did. She raised money for charity for a heart, the heart foundation. And, and to me, I mean that’s a good demonstration of morals where you’re not only trying to raise money, but you’re, you’re actively doing something to try to try to help someone else.:
Speaker 6:
7:06
I also know that she donates blood occasionally. She:
Speaker 4:
7:10
does every, every few months when she’s allowed to. She donates blood to help others as well. So I think mommy is an excellent example of this. So the next trip that we have here is confident. They say most people admire those who project confidence. Good role models have a healthy appreciation for their accomplishments. They are able to acknowledge their skills and achievements without becoming arrogant, healthy, self confidence, manifest as pride in who you are and what you’ve learned through your life. So before I even ask your thoughts on that, let me ask you this. Do you understand what they mean by arrogant? Yes. Okay, good. So that’s, that’s an important statement in this qualifier here. So you tell me how important do you think confidence and a role model is?:
Speaker 6:
7:59
Well, I would definitely say that confidence would definitely be a good quality for a good role model. As long as you don’t overuse it, like it’s good to be confident. Like if someone was being bullied or hurt, I would definitely, if he had the confidence to help in any way, I definitely think that would be a good role model for younger people who might’ve seen someone like that do something.:
Speaker 4:
8:27
I think that’s a very good point. Another example, and I’ll go back to mommy on this, is mommy has a colleague that she used to work with, uh, who went to another job and was interested in having her come work for him. Um, but he basically told her that, you know, the position itself paid basically what she was already making and mommy thought about it and she decided, well, it might not be worthwhile to pursue that. Um, because she knows that she’s worth more than that to this individual. This individual was reaching out to Harris. What’s that level of confidence there that hey, if you want me to come, come work for you, then you need to pay me what I’m worth. So that confidence is something that allows you to be more successful and it’s not, it wasn’t had nothing to do with greed or anything like that.:
Speaker 4:
9:19
It was, I’m valuable to you. So you need to recognize that value. You can’t bring me in at, you know, a salary that’s not comparable to the value that you’re going to get out of me. I’m confident enough to know the value that I’m bringing to you. So that’s another uh, example of where this confidence comes in because then you’re confident if that’s who your role model is, then you’re confident in what you want to do. If you want to have a certain position in the band or if you want to play a certain sport or if you want to get a certain kind of job, it’s important to be confident in your own abilities. You know, we, you and I had the discussion and we had it with mommy about you taking on the more advanced classes in school next year and it was important for you to have the confidence to know that hey, I did it this year and I brought in, brought home straight A’s.:
Speaker 4:
10:15
There’s no reason I can’t do it next year and that confidence is going to help you excel in your classes next year. So it’s a very important tree. I agree. Uh, the next thing that we have is hardworking role models demonstrate their commitment to a desired goal and are willing to invest the necessary time and effort to achieve success. They don’t give up easily and they persevere when confronted by obstacles. Their passion to succeed inspires youngsters to follow them through and reach the goals they set for themselves. Olympic athletes, for example, motivate others through their dedication. How important is hardworking to you from a role model standpoint?:
Speaker 6:
11:01
Well, I would definitely say that would be an important trait for a role model because it would show that you’re willing to put all your effort into one goal and it’ll show and it’ll show kids, um, younger children, uh, having a hard work will, is a good tree.:
Speaker 4:
11:22
Yeah. Well, and a good example that I want to point to you is as having is, you know, you do your chores right, you have a job that you do at home and you earn money for doing that job. And when you earn that money, it takes on a new meaning for you. It doesn’t, it like you’re not as quick to go out and spend it frivolously on something silly. Nope. Cause you work hard for it. And when you get rewarded for your hard work, you have an appreciation for that reward. So that an example of a quality you have as a role model and that you don’t have a problem doing the work and getting the reward for it and you appreciate your ability to do that. So Kudos to you for that. Thank you. Respectful. This is one that I think is very important.:
Speaker 4:
12:10
In order for role models to be influential, they must show respect for others. Young people appreciate being treated with respect and admire. Those who treat them and others that way. Role models who demonstrate selflessness and a democratic non prejudice view of those different from themselves earn the admiration of others. And before I turn this over to you for your input, the one thing I did want to say here is in my experience, respect is probably the most valuable Karen. See that anybody could have. Because if you aren’t respected by your peers, by your family, by your coworkers, no matter who throughout life, if there isn’t respect, then it diminishes your worth. If I can’t respect you, I can’t trust you. I can’t work with you, I can’t care for you if I don’t respect you. So respect is very important. What are your thoughts on respect?:
Speaker 6:
13:10
Well, I definitely agree 100% I mean, if you were respectful and you were just snobby and I’m going to go back for confidence with how, with your efforts, you would pretty much be snobby. No one would look up to you and you’d be a negative role model. Right? Oh, with respect, you show that you don’t care about just yourself and your qualities. You care about other people and the ways they perceive you eyes. Yeah, and you care that you’re a good person:
Speaker 4:
13:44
and that’s absolutely right. Yeah. You’re the respect that you have for others and that others have for you help build your reputation and your reputation is probably the most important thing that you have in your life. Very good. Thoughts on that? The next one and the last one that we have in on this subject that we’ll talk about is optimistic and creative role models inspire others with an upbeat, optimistic outlook on life. Role models tend to see the bright side in difficult situations and can find creative solutions to their problems. How important is optimism to you when it comes to role models? Are leaders even we’ll say,:
Speaker 6:
14:26
well, I’ll definitely say optimism is definitely important because it’ll get people involved in what you’re trying to say. And it’ll give people a brighter look on life because I’m pretty sure most teenagers, including myself, are guilty of having a very negative view on life. Right. But with like optimism, you might actually get a better view on life and become a better person and then they’ve won. Who is a role model that can show that to kids is definitely a good role model and not a negative one. If you’re a negative one, you probably don’t have as much optimism. And if you are a good one, you probably have a lot of optimism and definitely is inspire young minds and show:
Speaker 4:
15:12
and I agree and I think, oh, you know, I’ll be the first one to admit that I dig myself on this one because I, you know, I don’t have a negative outlook on things, but because of my position and what I do, you know, it’s always been my job to find things that are vulnerable and fix them before they get compromised. You know, working in technology and stuff. So as a result, I tend to be over analytical and I’m the type of person who will take the glass half full, half empty scenario. Some of them will ask me if the glass is half full and I’ll, you know, my responses immediately. How did the water get in there? How did the water level get to that point? If you pour the water in, then it’s half full. If you’re poor to full glass out to get to that, then it’s half empty and people tend to look down on me and see it’s negative. It’s really not as what I like to describe as as realistic view. Realistic. Exactly. Um, but optimism is important because you know the days that we see you and you’re down and you come home from school and you’re down in on, one of the first things that we try to do is one, figure out if something happened in two, let’s, let’s figure out something that was good to happen today.:
Speaker 6:
16:23
Unfortunately I’m kind of, I’m quite stubborn in those times. I’m pretty sure I’d probably find you more annoying.:
Speaker 4:
16:29
You did that. You probably do. Um, but you know, persistence is important when it comes to that sort of thing.:
Speaker 5:
16:37
Yup.:
Speaker 4:
16:43
So we’re going to talk a little bit about the effects that positive role models have on teams. So the first thing that we talk about here is self esteem and academic performance. Teenagers who have positive role models have greater self esteem obviously and perform better in school than teenagers without role models in their lives. Students may have coaches, teachers, famous athletes or parents as role models, positive displays of sportsmanship, determination, drive and ethics by role models can help children to emulate and adopt these positive attributes. I’ll turn it over to you in a second, but the one thing I did want to point out here is that, so we learn our behavior, our behavior is learned emulation. So when we see someone being affectionate with an animal, we’ll take, we’ll take a step back though our pets episode. If I see someone being affectionate towards our animal, NAC, the animal returning that affection, I then want to emulate that effect by being nice to my kids or my pants or whatever. So we learned through ambulation, which is why it’s important that we have positive role models because we try to emulate those role models based on that itself. How important do you think boosting your self esteem role models play in that, in that relationship?:
Speaker 6:
18:13
Oh, I’d definitely say that role models will help build yourself esteem. It’ll help Roma positive role models. We’ll probably give you a more positive view on life and make you stop looking for the flaws you have and instead looking for, for all of the good things you have in you. That’s a very good point. Helping with your self esteem.:
Speaker 4:
18:37
Good point. The other point, or the next point that we have here is, uh, role models. Positive role models help in avoiding drug and alcohol abuse. Positive role models can help children avoid the use of drugs and alcohol. For example, role models in sports who promote excellence without the use of performance enhancing drugs can have the effect of discouraging the use of steroids in athletes who look up to these role models. And I don’t, you know, I don’t want to lock on to that scenario as being the ultimate example. I’d much rather look at the role models that you see in day to day life. Like for instance, um, last year you went through the dare program at school and the role models that you had there where your teachers, the police officers that were running the dare program, these are the role models that you really need to see cause their everyday role models. These are the people that you deal with. Um, did you have a positive reaction to the dare program when you ran it?:
Speaker 6:
19:42
Well, honestly at first glance I wasn’t. I was a little uneasy because I didn’t feel as though I wanted to learn about all that stuff. Even though I knew before I wasn’t going to do drugs. But afterwards I definitely got a positive view on. I definitely had a better view on life knowing that drugs were bad and they could possibly and potentially kill me.:
Speaker 4:
20:04
Yes. Yes. And, and the, the officers that you had in your dear program, did you see them as role models in helping you to avoid that? Yup. I did what I did and they do a fantastic job and I give him full credit for not only the time that they spend, but the caring that they put in. I mean they, they genuinely care about the kids that they’re trying to keep away from these things.:
Speaker 6:
20:29
I also want to mention that both of you or mommy also helped me stop. No, avoid drugs and alcohol have the more, and you know that I get a current kind of insane when mommy mentioned that she’s going to drink alcohol or something. Right. You know how I am about that.:
Speaker 4:
20:46
Then occasionally mommy have a glass of wine here and there. It’s nothing to access. But I think, I think if anything, it’s a good example of when you of age to consume alcohol. Obviously drugs are illegal for everyone regardless of age. But when you reach an age where you’re legally allowed to consume alcohol, there’s nothing wrong with having alcohol in moderation, you know, in a social environment or something like that. And you know, there’s even studies that show that there are certain health benefits to it and mommy is a good example of that. You know, mommy can have a stressful day, come home, have a glass of wine helper, relax, you know, she doesn’t drink to access is the important thing.:
Speaker 6:
21:29
Yeah. But normally I would get a little paranoid. I would always say, you got your drone, you can, I can try on Dad’s gonna drive and you can make it wrong.:
Speaker 4:
21:37
But she doesn’t though. Does she know she doesn’t ever seen mommy drunk? Nope. No. Cause she doesn’t do that.:
Speaker 6:
21:43
Yeah, I know. And neither of you to smoke either. So:
Speaker 4:
21:47
no, smoking is something that my parents turned me off of because they both smoked.:
Speaker 6:
21:51
Yeah. I also learned stuff from school old multiple assemblies and stuff saying how to pat about tobacco and know and like we haven’t had this one conversation where the government is trying to get people to eat healthy. You have to not illegal eyes and tobacco,:
Speaker 4:
22:09
right? Yeah. Yeah. Unfortunately the government can sometimes be rather hypocritical and its stance on regulation. Yep. So the next thing that we have is anger management. Something I think all teams can benefit from. Children learn how to handle life’s problems in part by seeing how their parents and caregivers handle them, children are very likely to follow their parents’ behaviors. This reality makes it important for you to show good skills in handling your anger. Also, children who have good communication with their parents are more likely to ask them for advice. Instead of turning to peers or parents give respect to their children. They are more apt to get respect. When a child knows how to give respect and feels respected, the child is less likely to have feelings of humiliation, anger, or embarrassment and is less likely to lash out.:
Speaker 6:
23:06
Now before you speak, I just want to say in the beginning where you follow your parents footsteps, right? I just want us to, unfortunately that’s a kind of a bad thing for me. You Yell at technology at times and unfortunately that rubbed off on me and I yell at technology too.:
Speaker 4:
23:24
Well, I will offer a rebuttal there. See you. When I was your age, I had anger management issues and my anger management issues. We’re not restricted to yelling at technology or inanimate objects. I would get into fights and I would get into a lot of fights and I got into trouble quite often when I got into those fights and I often did things I didn’t like. I hurt people. I didn’t want to hurt and there were consequences to it. So one of the things that I had to learn fairly early on was anger management and the anger management. I guess the biggest takeaway for me was don’t hurt people, hurt inanimate objects if you have to. So that’s sort of where that comes from. I have to, you know, that energy had to be focused somewhere. I mean even you’ve had some coaching in this, like what are, what are some of the techniques that you’ve been told to focus that anger so that you’re not targeted at people?:
Speaker 6:
24:22
Well, normally I would have to push a wall getting all my anger out on using force. Right. Probably counting backwards. Yeah. Repeating in my head they’re not worth it. They’re not worth it. They’re not worth it. And also screaming that technology helps as well.:
Speaker 4:
24:38
And there you go. And they’re all valid techniques. I have,:
Speaker 6:
24:41
I agree. I’ve never actually lashed out at anyone. I just lashed out at a technology and an animate object:
Speaker 4:
24:46
and that’s important. And ultimately you’re the one that pays the bill for that cause we could break your phone cause you get mad at someone, then you’re the one that has to replace your phone. Yeah. Two point anger management and other good thing that role models help us with. The other one that we have for your, on the last one that we have in this category is overcoming difficulties. Role models can have the effect of encouraging people to achieve their goals despite difficulties. Maya Angelo overcame poverty and abuse during her childhood and became a best selling inspirational writer. She’s another example of a role model who can inspire people to overcome their difficulties and achieve success. So we all, I mean even, you know, everyone encounters difficulties in life at various stages and knowing how to I I imagine is what, how to overcome those as important, is it not? Yeah, it’s definitely important. So could, do you have any examples of difficulties that have role models helped you with?:
Speaker 6:
25:47
Well, yes. So as not in the beginning of the year, it was definitely stressful. You know, I kinda had emotional breakdowns, but afterwards, after you guys talked with me and I was able to share my problems with you, I started calming down and eventually as the school year got on, I just dumped facing most difficult days. And now I’m perfectly fine in school. I haven’t really had too many difficulties.:
Speaker 4:
26:17
Let’s do a little bit of question and answers now. Alrighty. Now that we’ve had the discussion, you understand what all these examples are. Let me ask you, do you think it’s a good idea to have role models?:
Speaker 6:
26:28
Yes, I do. And the reason for that being is um, to have a positive effect on the child. Like we said before, children no, don’t really have, um, role models probably won’t have as many effects with positive role models like other children do who have positive role models, kids who don’t have role models probably don’t have as many life lessons and probably are more snobby and less likely to become successful, confident, hardworking. And any other quality a role model should have and they’re more likely to maybe even become a negative Roma?:
Speaker 4:
27:13
No. Okay, good points. What qualities do you think are most important in role models?:
Speaker 6:
27:19
Well, hardworking, definitely. Um, respect of your sleep and it’s definitely one of the best qualities. Optimism. Yes. Well, pretty much all the ones we talked about at all. Important. I mean, sure, some are more important than others, like respects more porn than optimism, but still there.:
Speaker 4:
27:39
Are there any qualities that you think are important in a role model that we didn’t discuss today? Intelligence. Okay. That’s certainly helpful. And about one that we mentioned, but we didn’t talk about like sportsmanship, you know, it’s important to to you know, be a good winter but also to be a good loser at times because you don’t always win. Right. So the next question I had was do you have any role models?:
Speaker 6:
28:03
Yes I do. I have you and Mommy who are definitely good role models. I have the dare officers and I also have all my teachers that um, I’ve had during the years of school, I’ve been in:
Speaker 4:
28:18
very good teachers. They all serve as good role models, but I think teachers through the years because so many of them come across your path that they’re excellent role models. And the last question that I had here is do you think you are a role model?:
Speaker 6:
28:34
Well, looking at all the qualities we’ve discussed, let’s just go down. Sure. Let’s just go down the list. So one of the qualities is moral, like showing good quality. And for other people I’d say I can be quite moral at times, as long as I’m not, and then they get a bad attitude.:
Speaker 4:
28:57
Okay. Let me ask you, let me ask you a counter question. If you do something wrong, and I don’t mean kick the desk like you just did, but if you do something wrong and say you hurt someone’s feelings, do you recognize that and try to correct it? Do you feel bad for doing that? Yes. Then I think that is a good, good handle on what your moral conferences,:
Speaker 6:
29:17
uh, confidence. Um, in some cases, in some cases not because unfortunately I feel as though I might have social anxiety, so,:
Speaker 4:
29:27
okay. Well, you know, you can’t be confident in everything, right?:
Speaker 6:
29:30
Yep. Hardworking. Like we said before, I definitely feel as though I’m hardworking and things:
Speaker 4:
29:35
you definitely a good example of that.:
Speaker 6:
29:37
Respectful. I definitely can say, and I’m pretty sure you can say to, I’m quite respectful to others.:
Speaker 4:
29:44
Well, more importantly, other people say that to me. And really that’s the biggest compliment. So when, when someone comes up to me and tells me how respectful you are and how polite you are, you know, that’s, I couldn’t ask for a bigger compliment. Optimistic and creative probably needs some work there. Huh? Well optimism sign we did:
Speaker 6:
30:07
well like you said before, like you have, um, a relativistic realistic view on life. I feel as though I’m in that realistic view of life. I don’t always have a negative view on life even though most of the time I do. Right, okay. I can definitely say I have more kids at school that annoy both me and my friend Lindsey. And I can definitely say I don’t enjoy it very much and I’m pretty sure Lindsey doesn’t enjoy it very much either.:
Speaker 4:
30:34
There’s too many people that late being annoyed to be honest with you.:
Speaker 6:
30:37
Yeah. I’ve noticed that in the beginning of the years, of course I felt really angry and I wanted to punch someone some things. Okay. But over the school year I’ve started to calm down and unfortunately Lindsay has not gone to that stage yet, but I’m normally the one telling her, hey, it’s not worth it. Let’s go, let’s go back to what we were doing. Okay.:
Speaker 4:
31:00
Well and you are a few years older so you weren’t expected to be a little bit more mature.:
Speaker 6:
31:05
And I also taught her some of the lessons you taught me like not going to matter later on in your life. They’re only going to know you for this period of new life. Eventually I’ll move away from them. I know go on your separate paths.:
Speaker 4:
31:16
Right. And that’s, I think that’s a safe philosophy:
Speaker 6:
31:19
and creative. You know I’m creative.:
Speaker 4:
31:20
You are a creative beyond my wildest imagination. Yeah, that’s a pun by the way. Oh Wow. That’s all the questions that I had. I think we are just about ready for closing remarks and shout outs and I turn it over to you for closing remarks in shout outs.:
Speaker 6:
31:44
Okay. So for anyone who does have role models, I would definitely make sure looking through the list we’ve had, I would definitely advise you to make sure you check and make sure they’re not a negative role model if they are, try not to follow them like at all because like we’ve said before, negative role models are not good for teenagers and younger minds and always try to follow positive role models. And if you do think you’re a role model or aren’t quite sure if you’re a role model, please try some of the qualities and please try your best to be a good role model and try to think of what other people would think of you and your own reputation.:
Speaker 4:
32:26
All very good points. Did you have shout outs to anyone for today?:
Speaker 6:
32:30
Well I will give a shout out to all the role models I have including my parents, did their officers and my teacher.:
Speaker 4:
32:38
Awesome. Well I that does it for us today. Uh, I want to thank you Madison to for another fantastic podcast. Thank you once again for having me. And a third time was a charm. I think we got through this one successfully. Finally. I definitely think we did too, and we can put this one in the books. All right. We’ll talk to everyone next week.:

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