https://www.podbean.com/media/share/pb-mr6tw-11d855f
Almost every teenager goes through wild periods of self-expression that will typically include clothing and musical choices that are borderline offensive to their parents. However, it’s important not to stifle your teen while they experiment with different versions of self-expression. After all, as long as they are not hurting themselves or anyone around them, there is really nothing wrong with their actions. In this episode of Insights Into Teens we’ll explore how self-expression allows teenagers to discover who they are and helps form their adult personalities.
Show Notes
INTRO THEME]
[INTRODUCTIONS]
Insights Into Teens: Episode 143 “Self Expression”
My calm and collected co-host Madison Whalen
Summary
Almost every teenager goes through wild periods of self-expression that will typically include clothing and musical choices that are borderline offensive to their parents. However, it’s important not to stifle your teen while they experiment with different versions of self-expression. After all, as long as they are not hurting themselves or anyone around them, there is really nothing wrong with their actions. In this episode of Insights Into Teens we’ll explore how self-expression allows teenagers to discover who they are and helps form their adult personalities.
Show Plugs
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[TRANSITION]
[SEGMENT 1]
What is the Meaning of Self-Expression?
https://positivepsychology.com/self-expression/
https://bit.ly/3ibNs74
Self-expression is defined as expressing one’s thoughts and feelings, and these expressions can be accomplished through words, choices or actions
At its core self-expression is the action of expressing yourself, and it can take a wide variety of forms.
You can use your words, your facial expressions, your body, your movements, clothing, actions, and possessions to express your authentic inner self.
While the idea is simple, the concept, importance and understanding of self-expression seems elusive to many people
We are often bombarded with messages about how we should look, think, speak, and act; what we should eat and drink and study and do for fun; who we should associate with and who we should love or despise
We are flooded with everyone else telling us who we should be deep down.
This pressure about what we should do and who we should be can make it difficult to simply be ourselves, we’re too busy trying to live up to other people’s expectations
The Self-Expression Theory
There is no one single theory of self-expression in psychology, but there are several explorations and hypotheses surrounding this subject in the literature.
Self-expression is one of the most highly-regarded values in Western civilization due to the importance placed on the concept of “the individual” in our society.
Not only is self-expression a vital concept of Western society, it’s also ingrained into the very roots of psychology.
Psychology is the study of the mind, including the self, others, and groups of people.
We learn about the mind through the expression of individuals
While the West has embraced individualistic norms and practices, including self-expression, other cultures have upheld collectivist values
In some cases these other cultures place little to no value on individualism.
[AD1: SSE]
[SEGMENT 2]
The Importance of Self Expression in Teens
http://residentialtreatmentforteens.com/self-expression-and-teenage-girls/
https://bit.ly/3u3dcbB
Adolescence is a time of discovery, so in order to prosper and grow, teenagers must actualize individuality through self-expression by finding their passions and what exactly makes them who they are.
In the words of Aristotle,
“Happiness is an expression of the soul in considered actions.”
Self-expression is healthy for teenagers who are exploring their interests
By learning about personal talents, adolescents can find their life’s purpose, call to action, career path, or quality hobbies.
Self-expression is indicative of inner thoughts, feelings, and opinions while being a manifestation of how people interact with the world.
Oftentimes, because of outside influences from peers, family members, and authority figures, adolescents suppress the natural need to communicate or freely display their beliefs and desires.
Articulating meanings can be difficult for young people who have yet to fully practice freedom of self-expression, so it’s important to provide supportive opportunities and creative outlets to teenagers.
Communication, body-language, artwork, fashion, music, and so much more are all correlating aspects of self-expression.
The value of self-expression in adolescents is immeasurable, as it is vital to their growth and development.
Fear can inhibit the reveal of truth, and low self-confidence, poor self-esteem, or harsh self-evaluation will also keep teenagers from reaching their full potential.
Even inappropriate or disingenuous self-expression can be harmful, so guidance and support is a wonderful solution to helping teens find their identity and positively express themselves.
Examples of Self-Expression
https://positivepsychology.com/self-expression/
https://bit.ly/3ibNs74
Everywhere you look you can see examples of self-expression.
This may sound like an exaggeration, but it’s not—people around you are expressing themselves every day in many ways, all you need to do is look for it.
Common ways that people in your life might express themselves include:
Sharing details about their day and how it made them feel.
Wearing an off-trend or outdated item of clothing, not to be cool and unique, but just because they like it.
Playing guitar on the street without a hat, cup, or other container set up to take donations.
Yelling to express their frustration about traffic or other hindrances to getting from A to B.
Employing body language (either consciously or unconsciously) that tells you exactly how someone feels about him- or her-self, whether it’s tall and proud, slumped and defeated, or anywhere in between.
How to Improve Self-Expression Skills
As with most skills, the best way to improve your self-expression skills is to practice them!
Self-expression skills include—but are not limited to—the following:
Speaking
Writing
Body language
Artistic endeavors (creating music, dancing, etc.)
Write (almost) everyday… It forces you to find the right words and expressions to convey your message.
Emulate your favorite authors’ styles
Never lose a chance to speak in public.
Apply winning formulas (particularly for public speaking, as there are many tricks and “secret weapons” to help you succeed).
[AD2: ENTERTAINMENT]
[SEGMENT 3]
Techniques for Developing Self-Expression
If you’re looking for ways to boost children’s self-expression skills, there are a lot of engaging and seemingly indirect ways to familiarize themselves with expressing themselves and understanding others.
The following strategies will help to encourage a child to build their self-expression skills:
Work on the art of conversation
Celebrate your child’s style by allowing him or her to dress however they’d like (given that it’s age-appropriate).
Encourage your child to mentor younger children to practice their own skills and do a good deed.
Get outdoors and do a nature-oriented activity together (e.g., take a walk, go for a hike, do some gardening).
Help your child make a video documentary about him- or herself, including their current likes and dislikes, strengths, interests, and passions
How can I help my children express themselves?
https://sunshinehouse.com/blog/5-ways-to-help-your-children-express-themselves/
https://bit.ly/3MTN1wz
Emphasize the arts
The arts are an easy way for your kids to express their feelings without saying a word.
Art therapy is proven to improve physical, mental, and emotional well-being through creative self-expression for children and adults.
It’s not just restricted to the traditional drawing or painting either—the arts can include music, dancing, and performance.
Encourage your kids to try different art forms and explore their favorite artistic mediums.
Support style decisions
Clothing is a form of self-expression – there are hints about who you are in what you wear.
Let your children pick out their clothing, even if it looks silly, to encourage their self-expression.
This will help them feel confident and unique wherever they go.
Offer opportunities to choose
Slowly introduce your children to the concept of choice.
Let them decorate their room or choose their hairstyle
By introducing the concept of choice, your children will learn what they do and do not like—which will help shape their understanding of themselves as they become adults.
Encourage exploration
It’s vitally important to let your children explore their own interests instead of the camps or activities you’ve picked out for them.
Find websites and brochures for your kids in a variety of parent-approved activities and let them test out what they’re interested in—whether it be ballet or robotics, they’ll find their niche better if they decide.
Talk About Your Feelings
As a parent, you are your child’s biggest role model in life.
Teach your children about healthy self-expression by discussing your emotions and why you are feeling sad, mad, or glad.
[TRANSITION]
[CLOSE]
Closing thoughts shoutouts
[OUTRO AND CREDITS]
Show Plugs
Subscriptions:
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Tunein
Contact Info
Email us at:
Comments@insightsintothings.com
Twitter:
@insights_things
Hi-res videos on Youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/insightsintothings
Streaming 5 days a week on Twitch:
http://www.twitch.tv/insightsintothings
Audio Versions:
http://podcast.insightsintoteens.com/#
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Links to all these on the web Web:
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Transcription
00:00:01:23 – 00:00:41:14
Narrator
Insightful podcast by informative host for insights into things. A podcast network Welcome to Insights into Teens. A podcast series exploring the issues and challenges of today’s youth. Your hosts are Joseph and Madison, well as a father and daughter team making their way through the challenges of.
00:00:41:14 – 00:00:42:26
Narrator
The teenage years.
00:00:51:13 – 00:01:04:12
Joseph
Welcome to Insights into Teens. This is episode one 43 Self-expression. I’m your host, Joseph Whelan, and my calm and collected co-host, Madison Whalen.
00:01:04:15 – 00:01:05:07
Madison
Hi, everyone.
00:01:05:14 – 00:01:06:13
Joseph
Hey, Andre. Matty.
00:01:06:25 – 00:01:08:04
Madison
I’m doing all right. How about you?
00:01:08:10 – 00:01:11:13
Joseph
I’m doing pretty good. How was your week this week?
00:01:12:08 – 00:01:13:06
Madison
It’s been pretty good.
00:01:13:23 – 00:01:20:25
Joseph
Pretty good. Good. I guess that’s better than. I don’t know. So we’re getting there, right? Anything exciting this week?
00:01:21:05 – 00:01:28:19
Madison
Oh, let’s see. I’m having my what do you call it?
00:01:29:20 – 00:01:30:15
Joseph
I don’t know what you call.
00:01:31:01 – 00:01:32:10
Madison
History quiz tomorrow.
00:01:33:24 – 00:01:34:16
Joseph
That’s exciting.
00:01:34:18 – 00:01:35:06
Madison
I don’t know.
00:01:36:15 – 00:01:38:17
Joseph
You have a very different idea of exciting than I do.
00:01:39:21 – 00:01:53:12
Madison
There’s an interesting thing we’re going to be doing in L.A. this week that is on a topic that I’m a little not okay with, but it’ll be kind of fun to go through. I guess.
00:01:53:21 – 00:01:57:00
Joseph
That’s vague. It’s something you can share details about a.
00:01:57:12 – 00:01:59:27
Madison
Difference between having crushes and true love.
00:02:00:18 – 00:02:28:17
Joseph
Oh, interesting. Okay. It should be interesting how that plays out. Yeah, but that’s not what we’re talking about today. Yeah. Today we’re talking about self-expression. Almost every teenager goes through wild periods of self-expression that will typically include clothing and musical choices that are borderline offensive to their parents. However, it’s important not to stifle your teen while they experiment with different versions of self-expression.
00:02:29:14 – 00:02:54:19
Joseph
After all, as long as they’re not hurting themselves or anyone around them, there really is nothing wrong with their actions. In this episode of Insights in the Teens, we’ll explore how self-expression allows teenagers to discover who they are and helps them form their adult personalities. But before we do that, though, I would like to invite our listening and viewing audience to subscribe to the podcast.
00:02:55:00 – 00:03:19:21
Joseph
You can get audio versions of this podcast listeners insights into teens, video versions of the podcast can be found listed as insights in the things we do. Do audio versions on that stream as well. You can find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Stitcher, on iHeartRadio, pretty much anywhere you get a podcast these days. I’d also invite you to write in, give us your feedback.
00:03:20:12 – 00:03:47:08
Joseph
You can email us at comments and insights into things that come. You can find us on Twitter and Twitter under the underscore bar where I blew that one, didn’t I? Yeah. You can find us on Twitter at Twitter.com. Insights underscore things. You can find us on Facebook at Facebook dot com slash insights into things podcast. We’re on Instagram and Instagram dot com slash insights into things.
00:03:47:26 – 00:03:56:19
Joseph
Or you can find links to that and much more on our official website and insights into things dot com. Ready to get into it? Yup. You know, we go.
00:04:02:12 – 00:04:26:11
Madison
So what is the meaning of self-expression? This comes to us from positive psychology income and it says that self-expression is defined is defined as expressing one’s thoughts and feelings. And these expressions can be accomplished through words choices or actions. And its core self-expression is the action of expressing yourself. And you can take it from a wide variety of forms.
00:04:27:00 – 00:05:02:11
Madison
You can use it words, you, facial expressions, your body, your movements, clothing, actions and possessions to express your authentic inner self While the idea will not take off the L. Well, the idea is simple. The concept important and understanding of self-expression seems elusive to many people. We are often bombarded with messages about how we should look. Think speak and act what we should eat and drink and study and do for fun.
00:05:02:23 – 00:05:23:04
Madison
Who we should associate with and who we should love or despise. We are flooded with everyone else telling us who we should be. Deep down, there’s pressure about what we should do and who we should be can make it difficult to simply be ourselves. Well, too busy trying to live up to other people’s expectations.
00:05:23:28 – 00:05:56:23
Joseph
Now there’s a theory or several theories, I guess, around selfish spur action. There’s no one single theory of self-expression in psychology, but several explorations. They like the calm explorations and hypotheses surrounding the subject. Self-expression is one of the most highly regarded values in Western civilization due to the importance placed on the concept of individual in our society. Not only is self-expression a vital concept in Western society.
00:05:57:07 – 00:06:25:23
Joseph
It’s also ingrained into the very roots of psychology, psychology being the study of the mind, including the self. Others and groups of people. We learn about the mind through the expression of individuals. While the West has embraced individualistic norms and practices, including self-expression. Other cultures have upheld collectivist values. In some cases, these other cultures place little or no value on individualism.
00:06:26:07 – 00:06:57:26
Joseph
Not included that in there, just so we can kind of put things into perspective. This idea of self-expression really is a Western concept. When you get into some of the Eastern religions and Eastern societies, you know, you go to Japan today. There’s not really that dry for for individualistic self-expression. Everyone is a community. There are a society as a whole out there, and they work towards the greater good of everyone.
00:06:59:10 – 00:07:26:03
Joseph
Some people would even say that that’s kind of a a socialist or a communist style of of thinking as well. And you could say that to to a certain extent, but that’s more of a political, geopolitical type of stance. It’s really a Western society thing where it’s it’s about me. It’s it’s not even just self-expression. It’s self-exploration. You know, we as we express ourselves, we’re learning about ourselves.
00:07:26:15 – 00:07:31:19
Joseph
Mm hmm. How do you feel? Do you feel that you do that? Self-expression is a very important part of your life.
00:07:32:10 – 00:08:12:25
Madison
I mean, yeah, I can think of a specific example involving my clothing. I don’t really tend to like most formal outfits, specifically dresses and skirts and for a while. When it was picture day, Mommy would get me to wear a dress or something fancier and a lot of the times, I really wasn’t all that comfortable with it. And eventually, by the time I was in about sixth grade, I was around the time I kind of decided to speak up and say, I don’t really like that.
00:08:12:26 – 00:08:26:25
Madison
Can I look for a different alternatives? And after that, we started looking for different alternatives, and now I kind of just casual for photos. But when I do have to dress fancy, we kind of get clothes that look nice, but that I feel comfortable wearing.
00:08:27:18 – 00:08:35:00
Joseph
Well, and you’re very fortunate there because most most of clothes are not comfortable to wear in general. I think that’s kind of a rule of general rule of thumb.
00:08:35:05 – 00:08:35:18
Madison
Yeah.
00:08:36:28 – 00:09:05:10
Joseph
But yeah, we had a discussion along these topics before when we did one of our Q&A sessions and we talked about school uniforms and how school uniforms kind of robbed you of that self-expression in the interest of kind of putting everyone else on the same playing field. And that school uniform type thing is a very well adopted thing outside of our culture for that very reason.
00:09:05:22 – 00:09:26:20
Joseph
Do you think how do you think you would be able to function now? You’ve expressed an interest in in Japanese culture in the past, and you’re going to be taking your trip there in a few years. How do you think you would function in a society that didn’t put emphasis on individualism and it was more of a collective type of society do you think that would work well for you?
00:09:27:12 – 00:09:59:15
Madison
I mean, I don’t really think so. I do like expressing myself, for example, T-shirts that I like expressing my hobbies. And if I’m restricted a lot by clothing, I’m not really going to like it all that much. I prefer to express myself differently than others and, you know, express what I like to do instead of having to abide by what everyone has to Sure.
00:09:59:16 – 00:10:28:23
Joseph
Lot makes sense. Now, I can say that you’ve not had really any kind of rebellious streak in yourself pursuit of self-expression ism so far. So there hasn’t been anything that you’ve done that was really offensive in any way to or objectionable to Mommy or I Do you think that you’re a very self expressive person, or do you think that you’re kind of subdued when it comes to self-expression?
00:10:28:23 – 00:10:36:29
Joseph
And that’s why maybe you haven’t explored it to the point of that extreme? What are your thoughts on that? How expressive are you?
00:10:37:14 – 00:11:07:09
Madison
I mean, hmm, I’m probably not as vocal as I should be about it, but I express the hobbies I like. And I guess, like I haven’t really found any inherently in any hobbies that you guys don’t think I should have. For the most part, my hobbies are tame, kind of innocent, or you’re okay with me having none.
00:11:07:09 – 00:11:19:25
Joseph
Do you feel that Mommy and Daddy have put any kind of burdensome restrictions on your self-expression? Do you feel that you’ve been suppressed in any way by us? Um.
00:11:23:19 – 00:11:25:09
Madison
Well. Mm hmm.
00:11:28:05 – 00:11:54:09
Madison
I guess, like, I didn’t notice it kind of. And I’m pretty sure you guys didn’t really. But around the time that, you know, I had to wear those, I had to wear, like, dresses and such I. Well, I wouldn’t say you forced me into it, but you never really let me kind of explore other clothing options, like, it took me a while to find out.
00:11:54:10 – 00:12:03:29
Madison
Oh, wow. Hoodies are a thing, right? The most part, you guys, mommy probably is mainly. I mean, you’re.
00:12:03:29 – 00:12:05:13
Joseph
Not throwing anybody under the bus.
00:12:05:13 – 00:12:08:09
Madison
Here. It’s just like Mommy buys my clothes.
00:12:08:17 – 00:12:08:29
Joseph
Right?
00:12:09:00 – 00:12:10:09
Madison
You don’t really.
00:12:10:20 – 00:12:11:21
Joseph
Which is probably a good thing.
00:12:12:10 – 00:12:12:21
Madison
Yeah.
00:12:13:07 – 00:12:34:18
Joseph
So. Okay, so you we didn’t maybe we didn’t force you into a specific style or repress your self-expression. Do you think that was a factor of you not asserting yourself, or do you think that was mommy or daddy being overbearing in what we wanted to impose on you?
00:12:35:06 – 00:12:58:22
Madison
I mean, I guess I definitely think a lot of it was that I didn’t really vocalize it a lot. Um, and I think if I had vocalized it a bit more you guys would have let me be a bit more expressive. You would have let me experience all the different clothing, different styles of clothing that I hadn’t seen before and helped me to find out, okay, what outfits do I like?
00:12:59:07 – 00:13:04:14
Joseph
So besides clothing, how else do you express yourself? What are your forms of self-expression?
00:13:05:04 – 00:13:11:15
Madison
Um, I guess it would, let’s say.
00:13:16:16 – 00:13:19:19
Joseph
Do you so do you express yourself? I guess that’s a good word.
00:13:19:20 – 00:13:27:28
Madison
I mean, I do. I mean, I try to express myself I guess Hmm.
00:13:28:09 – 00:13:33:10
Joseph
Because a lot of it for a lot of people, self-expression is not that important, is it? Is it even important to you?
00:13:33:26 – 00:13:38:27
Madison
I mean, yeah, I’d say that it is important. And I just guess I can’t think of you.
00:13:38:27 – 00:13:41:03
Joseph
Just glance down at your nails there. Why?
00:13:43:01 – 00:13:44:25
Madison
I paint my nails now.
00:13:45:06 – 00:13:45:26
Joseph
So the camera.
00:13:46:13 – 00:13:49:12
Madison
Um, it’s not. They’re not perfect, but, you.
00:13:49:12 – 00:13:51:11
Joseph
Know, that’s a form of self-expression.
00:13:51:12 – 00:13:57:12
Madison
Yeah, I’ve started painting my nails more to express a certain part of myself.
00:13:58:01 – 00:14:02:10
Joseph
So self-expression, it sounds an awful lot like self-expression to you is a very visual thing.
00:14:02:18 – 00:14:07:25
Madison
I mean, yeah, I was also going to mention my hair, but I kind of felt like I should do something a little less visual.
00:14:08:23 – 00:14:18:13
Joseph
But that’s okay, because self-expression takes different forms for different people. If self-expression, if your outward self-expression is a visual thing, that’s perfectly fine, too.
00:14:18:18 – 00:14:28:17
Madison
And I think I can come up with, like, a lot of stuff. Like, I tend to have a lot of stuff hanging from my bag, so I kind of represent some of my hobbies.
00:14:28:20 – 00:14:32:27
Joseph
Sure. Yeah. Little little symbols of your personality.
00:14:32:29 – 00:14:51:29
Madison
I feel like a lot of that kind of comes down to like I think like that I feel a lot of people that are mostly introverted have that thing and like extroverted people obviously do that too. But like, I really do, people do that, like to maybe bring up topics of conversation or stuff like that or.
00:14:52:02 – 00:15:06:04
Joseph
Just to spur ideas and conversation and started it. So I could totally see that. All right. Well, let’s take a little break. We’ll come back. And when we come back, we’re going to talk about the importance of self-expression in teens. We’ll be right back.
00:15:14:29 – 00:15:45:04
Joseph
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00:15:45:28 – 00:16:09:13
Joseph
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00:16:16:27 – 00:16:45:05
Madison
Welcome back to INSIGHT and a deep into teens today we’re talking about self-expression. And now we’re going to talk about the importance of self-expression in teens. And this comes to us from residential treatment for teens, e-comm, So adolescence is a time of discovery. So in order to prosper and grow, teenagers must actualize individuality through self-expression. And finding their passions and what exactly makes them who they are.
00:16:45:27 – 00:17:06:16
Madison
In the words of Aristotle, happiness is an expression of the soul in considered actions. Self-expression is healthy for teenagers who are exploring their interest by learning about personal talents. Adolescence can find their life’s purpose. Call to action, career path or quality hobbies.
00:17:07:08 – 00:17:37:23
Joseph
Self-expression is indicative of inner thoughts, feelings, and opinions while being a manifestation of how people interact with the world, oftentimes because of outside influences from peers family members and authority figures. Adolescents suppress the natural need to communicate or freely display their beliefs and desires Articulating meanings can be difficult for young people who have yet to fully practice freedom of self-expression.
00:17:38:09 – 00:17:53:08
Joseph
So it’s important to provide supportive opportunities and creative outlets to teenagers communication, body language, artwork, fashion, music, and so much more are all correlating aspects of self-expression.
00:17:54:02 – 00:18:16:28
Madison
The value of self-expression and adolescence is immeasurable, as it is vital to their growth and development. Fear can inhibit the the reveal of truth and low self confidence, poor self-esteem or herself evaluation will also keep teenagers from reaching their full potential, even inappropriate or distinguished or just.
00:18:17:09 – 00:18:18:03
Joseph
Disingenuous.
00:18:18:09 – 00:18:29:20
Madison
Disingenuous self-expression can be harmful. So guidance and support is a wonderful solution to helping teens find their identity and positively express themselves.
00:18:30:10 – 00:18:40:16
Joseph
So what benefits do you think you get from your forms? Because we’ve talked about how visual your forms of self-expression are, what benefits do you think you get from your self-expression?
00:18:41:00 – 00:19:00:01
Madison
I guess, first of all, it would probably be comfort when it comes to clothing. I feel very comfortable wearing what I wear, and I don’t feel any form of discomfort from it, so I feel uncomfortable. I’m normally much happier, and I get a lot of positive benefits from that.
00:19:00:14 – 00:19:29:10
Joseph
And so know, I think my my self-expression is a lot of the same thing because, you know me, I dress casual all the time, and I want to be comfortable and I want to I want to present an attitude and an appearance of casualness, even at work. I want to do that because I somebody my size tends to immediately invoke almost hostile feelings from people like an intimidation or a fear.
00:19:29:10 – 00:19:54:12
Joseph
And I’ve I’ve led most of my life with that, and it’s made it very difficult to engage with people as a result. So part of my self-expression really is to diffuse some of those situations. My outward self-expression at least. So it’s wearing casual clothes. It’s having an outward sense of humor and trying to be pleasant with people to try to dissuade some of that initial thought of, oh, my God, look at this big giant guy.
00:19:54:12 – 00:20:27:05
Joseph
He must be a monster. It doesn’t always work. But internally and personally, my self-expression really is reflected more in my environment. I surround myself with the things that give me comfort and give me a sense of satisfaction, my collectibles, you know, my family, comfortable, you know, furniture, stuff like that, where I can come home from work and sort of wrap myself up in my self-expression.
00:20:28:24 – 00:20:52:14
Joseph
And to me, it’s a great way to unwind it’s a great way to diffuse for the day. You know, I make it while now come home, be cranky. You’ve seen me want to come home for work and I’m cranky and I come home and home is therapy for me. And that’s how I express myself. A lot of times I’m not sure where that’s going on.
00:20:52:18 – 00:21:01:24
Joseph
I can fix that. Do you get anything like that from a mental health standpoint, from your self-expression?
00:21:02:00 – 00:21:35:18
Madison
Yeah, and I feel a lot and I feel a good example and probably be art a lot of the times when I somewhat I had a rough day at school or I’m just not feeling too well when I get into the groove of drawing I find that I get a lot calmer and my mental state goes up and I can basically just focus on my art and which was something is something that’s in my control if I’m thinking about stuff that I can’t control.
00:21:36:05 – 00:22:06:10
Joseph
And that’s an only really great example of self-expression. And, you know, we have some others here, and this comes to us from positive psychology dot com. They see everywhere you look, you can see examples of self-expression This may sound like an exaggeration, but it’s not. People around you are expressing themselves every day in many ways. All you need to do is look for common ways that people in your life might express themselves, include sharing details about their day and how it made them feel.
00:22:06:11 – 00:22:25:18
Joseph
And that’s what we do. You know, during dinner, a lot of times we’re you know, now I’m picking off a couple of days a week from school to bring it home. We have a little bit of time to do that. Wearing an off trend or outdated item of clothing, not to be cool and unique. But just because you like it sounds right up your alley.
00:22:25:18 – 00:22:50:20
Joseph
They’re playing guitar on the street without a hat. A cup or other container set up to take donations. Just doing it for the joy of going out there and expressing your art and giving people a little bit of joy in doing that. Yelling to express your frustration about traffic or other hindrances, you know, getting from A to B, do you do you ever do screen therapy from time to time?
00:22:52:00 – 00:23:16:11
Madison
I will say one self-expression that I have yet to really mention. Anyone else is when I have lunch with my friend Carly and Micah, basically when if I had frustrations in the first half of the day, I kind of in a way scream about it. But I don’t like scream. I’m more or less just curse out.
00:23:16:17 – 00:23:32:29
Joseph
Yeah. And I’m the same way. I mean, you’ve seen me. I get angry at inanimate objects when I’m frustrated with them or something like that. And it’s usually me cursing at a computer or a monitor or whatever I’m working on at the time. It’s not going the way that I want, and it’s very therapeutic.
00:23:33:08 – 00:23:48:27
Madison
Yeah. And like when I’m not like at lunch and directly like kind of yelling this stuff or just speaking in an assertive way, I kind of like grunt. I like curse under my breath for the most part. Or just say, Oh my God, I need to stop. Or something like.
00:23:48:27 – 00:24:15:22
Joseph
That, right? Yeah. And that’s a form of self-expression. And if it’s something that allows you to focus on the moment and deal with the things that are troubling you, then that’s a benefit that you get from it. They also talk about employing body language or other consciously or unconsciously that tells you exactly how someone feels about him or herself, whether it’s tall and proud or slumped and defeated or somewhere in between there.
00:24:16:05 – 00:24:36:05
Joseph
There’s all kinds of different ways, and there’s no right way or wrong way to express yourself. And it’s different for everybody. And I think that’s the important thing. As long as you’re able and comfortable to express yourself, that’s important. Now, there may be different ways that we can improve our ways of self-expression. Talk about those.
00:24:37:05 – 00:25:02:29
Madison
So as with most skills, the best way to improve your self-expression skills is to practice them. Self-expression skills include, but are not limited to the following by speaking, writing, body language or artistic endeavors like creating music, dancing, etcetera. Right. Almost every day. It forces you to find the right words and expressions to convey your message. Emulate your friends, author, your favorite authors.
00:25:02:29 – 00:25:15:08
Madison
Styles. Never lose the chance to speak in public. Apply winning formulas, particularly for public speaking as there are many tricks and secret weapons to help you succeed.
00:25:15:19 – 00:25:40:17
Joseph
So one great thing that we do is we do a podcast every week. And one of the things that we’ve been doing recently is you’ve been taking a larger and larger role in hosting that podcast. And I’ve seen just in the last two times that you hosted the the level of improvement that you’ve had both, you know, not only in writing the script but in reading it.
00:25:40:17 – 00:26:00:08
Joseph
Now you there are less errors. You come in much more confident you would get totally freaked out. When I told you you were hosting the show today and you’re doing much better. But so there’s a level of confidence that you’re getting from that. And it’s all a matter of self-expression. And you probably didn’t realize it yourself expressing yourself.
00:26:00:17 – 00:26:00:27
Madison
Yeah.
00:26:01:15 – 00:26:15:10
Joseph
You know, some of the mannerisms that we do, you know, I’m a guy when I’m trying to think of something to say on the podcast, you’re a did you know or what’s the one that you start out with all the time?
00:26:17:19 – 00:26:23:29
Joseph
You do a lot of you know, there’s a name right there. You do a lot of shows when you start out of a statement.
00:26:25:16 – 00:26:26:14
Madison
Needless to say.
00:26:26:15 – 00:26:40:23
Joseph
Needless to say and then you’re saying anyway, so there’s the little mannerism. But it you it’s funny because your your brain doesn’t realize you’re doing these things and if you go back and you listen to the podcast, you pick them up real quick.
00:26:43:27 – 00:26:44:24
Joseph
What was Mommy’s?
00:26:45:22 – 00:26:47:13
Madison
Oh, my gosh. Oh.
00:26:48:01 – 00:26:54:07
Joseph
Mommy, have one. That’s a that’s a tell that even she realizes when she listens to the podcast You know, you know, you.
00:26:54:07 – 00:26:54:20
Madison
Know.
00:26:54:20 – 00:27:15:15
Joseph
She does, you know. Yeah. But it’s funny because you don’t realize it and until you go back and listen to it, you discover it then. And then you can improve your self-expression. So the podcast is a great tool for that. Now, not everyone out there is going to do a podcast Yeah, but there’s nothing to say that you can’t.
00:27:15:19 – 00:27:18:10
Joseph
Everyone likes to keep a diary. A lot of people keep diaries, right?
00:27:18:15 – 00:27:19:05
Madison
Yeah, you can.
00:27:19:05 – 00:27:37:24
Joseph
Keep an audio diary. You know, your phones now have audio recorders built in to keep an audio diary from day to day. Go back and listen to it once in a while and you’ll see the improvement that you have as you’re dictating to yourself. You’re monologuing, essentially something else that you’re very good at.
00:27:37:27 – 00:27:38:09
Madison
Yeah.
00:27:38:20 – 00:28:09:08
Joseph
So these are all different ways to improve your skills and self-expression is important, improving your self-expression because that self-expression is not always for your benefit. Right? Yeah. You’re expressing yourself to other people. Either your frustrations, your once your desires, who you are, you’re trying to communicate who you are. And if you can’t do that effectively, then you’re. Your message never comes across.
00:28:10:07 – 00:28:32:02
Joseph
So practicing and improving yourself is going to get you to where you want to be and make that self-expression even more effective for you. How do you think you are with self-expression, do you think? We talked about the various things that you do. Do you think that you’re effective at communicating your wants and desires and intent to people?
00:28:32:11 – 00:28:51:09
Madison
I definitely know that I could be better, but I think that I express my wants and desires. Okay. For the most part. Um. Could definitely be better. Okay. Thinking specifically when I ask for some stuff for.
00:28:51:10 – 00:29:01:15
Joseph
Yes. Yes. Your request for some stuff is not very good. No, at least you don’t. You don’t give me that, needless to say. That’s the funniest one that we. Needless to say, and don’t say it.
00:29:01:27 – 00:29:05:02
Madison
Yeah. I’ve been really trying to stop that one.
00:29:05:03 – 00:29:07:06
Joseph
And you’ve gotten much better about it.
00:29:07:23 – 00:29:14:27
Madison
Yeah, I was almost going to say it to Mommy. Today, and I was able to catch myself before I even wanted to see.
00:29:15:00 – 00:29:21:17
Joseph
And you learn new ways to express yourself and those improvements, how to express yourself better and get your message across.
00:29:21:22 – 00:29:23:27
Madison
I probably don’t need to work on the show thing, though.
00:29:24:00 – 00:29:29:14
Joseph
Yeah. And we’re always a work in progress. Nobody’s perfect. We’re always trying to improve.
00:29:29:21 – 00:29:30:00
Madison
Mm hmm.
00:29:30:22 – 00:29:38:24
Joseph
So we’re going to take our last break here, and then we’re going to come back and talk about different techniques for developing self-expression. We’ll be right back.
00:29:47:00 – 00:30:18:03
Narrator
Insights into Entertainment, a podcast series taking a deeper look into entertainment and media Our husband and wife team of pop culture fanatics are exploring all things from music and movies to television and fandom We’ll look at the interesting and obscure entertainment news of the week We’ll talk about theme park and pop culture news. We’ll give you the latest and greatest on pop culture conventions.
00:30:19:00 – 00:30:41:10
Narrator
We’ll give you a deep dove into Disney, Star Wars and much more Check out our video episodes at YouTube.com, Backslash Insights into things, our audio episodes and podcast insights into entertainment dot com or check us out on the web at insights into things dot com.
00:30:49:04 – 00:31:16:01
Madison
Welcome back to INSIGHT from the teens. Today we’re talking about self-expression And now we’re going to talk about techniques for developing self-expression. So if you’re looking for ways to boost children’s self-expression skills, there are a lot of engaging and seemingly indirect ways to familiarize themselves with expressing themselves and understanding others. The following strategies will help encourage a child to build their self-expression skills.
00:31:17:08 – 00:31:43:05
Madison
We have work on the art of conversation. Celebrate your child style by allowing him or her to dress however they’d like. Given that it’s age appropriate, encourage your child to mentor younger children to practice their own skills. And do a good deed. Get outdoors and do nature oriented activity together. Example taking a walk, going for a hiker, doing some gardening, or even like tape and doing work.
00:31:43:06 – 00:31:44:07
Joseph
That’s what we did last night.
00:31:44:11 – 00:31:55:10
Madison
You know how and help your child make a video documentary about him or herself, including their current likes and dislikes, strengths, interests and passions.
00:31:55:24 – 00:32:01:23
Joseph
So that list of an exhaustive list of things that are what do you what have you done.
00:32:04:05 – 00:32:25:08
Madison
I guess I’m celebrating celebrating my style by allowing you guys allow me to wear what I like, you know, given the age appropriate. Right. You allow me to have T-shirts that express some that I like allow me to get hoodies at pretty much every place we go.
00:32:26:01 – 00:32:28:00
Joseph
That’s kind of our theme at this point of work.
00:32:28:03 – 00:32:32:09
Madison
I mean, yeah, whenever we travel to a new place, we just get a new hoodie.
00:32:32:12 – 00:32:41:04
Joseph
Right What about mentoring? Have you had an opportunity to mentor any any younger kids?
00:32:41:14 – 00:32:58:17
Madison
I mean, I’ve kind of mentored my younger friends I’ve definitely mentored them with homework and such. And I’ve also tried and I know my two friends sometimes fight, so I’ve helped mentor them on how to make up. At that point. Okay.
00:32:59:26 – 00:33:02:22
Joseph
You’re an outdoors person. Not so much.
00:33:02:29 – 00:33:03:17
Madison
Not really.
00:33:04:08 – 00:33:07:26
Joseph
Yesterday evening was probably the most outdoors you’ve done since Ban, right?
00:33:07:28 – 00:33:08:20
Madison
Fair enough.
00:33:09:00 – 00:33:12:26
Joseph
And we were we were late to ever battling last night.
00:33:13:03 – 00:33:13:13
Madison
Yeah.
00:33:14:10 – 00:33:18:24
Joseph
Making a video or a documentary about yourself or you ever thought about doing something like that?
00:33:19:15 – 00:33:20:03
Madison
I mean.
00:33:21:06 – 00:33:22:14
Joseph
I mean, the podcast. Really?
00:33:22:15 – 00:33:25:14
Madison
Yeah. I was going to say the podcast is kind of that.
00:33:25:18 – 00:33:31:29
Joseph
Yeah. I mean, it’s really we couldn’t get much more detailed than what we do on the podcast.
00:33:32:05 – 00:33:39:09
Madison
But I mean, yeah, when I monologue in the shower, I kind of pretend that I’m making a video.
00:33:39:19 – 00:33:45:15
Joseph
Well, and that’s the thing, you know? So I got you the digital recorder so you can record your monologue. So you could do that.
00:33:47:26 – 00:33:48:17
Madison
Well, not.
00:33:48:17 – 00:33:49:02
Joseph
So much.
00:33:49:09 – 00:33:51:29
Madison
They don’t fit. It probably wouldn’t work in the shower.
00:33:52:13 – 00:33:55:16
Joseph
Probably not. But you monologue elsewhere, though, too.
00:33:55:28 – 00:34:06:05
Madison
Yeah, I guess. I guess it’s I don’t know, like, I know that there’s this thing where it’s like, I don’t know, I can do it perfectly fine when I’m not being recorded.
00:34:06:17 – 00:34:16:00
Joseph
I say so as long as there’s no stakes involved, you’re okay. Yeah. Okay. Well, and the podcast itself is another way to work on the art of conversation as well.
00:34:16:05 – 00:34:16:27
Madison
I mean, yeah.
00:34:17:13 – 00:34:41:18
Joseph
So we talked about what is self-expression. Why does it benefit you? What are the different types of it? And I don’t prove it. So how can I help my children express themselves? Because it clearly we we’ve kind of fallen flat a few times with you, especially with the formal, where so what can we do as parents to help our children express themselves?
00:34:42:05 – 00:35:10:01
Joseph
So the first thing that they tell us, and this comes to us from Sunshine, how star comics, they emphasize the arts. The arts are an easy way for your kids to express their feelings without saying a word. Art therapy is proven to improve physical, mental and emotional well-being. The creative self-expression through creative self self-expression for children and adults so even adults can express themselves through art.
00:35:11:01 – 00:35:35:21
Joseph
It’s not just restricted to traditional drawing or painting either. The arts can include music, dancing and performance. Encourage your kids to try different art forms and explore their favorite artistic mediums. Support style decisions. And this is where we fell down, and I think we’re getting better at it. Clothing is a form of self-expression. There are hints about who you are and what you wear.
00:35:36:13 – 00:35:46:00
Joseph
Let your children pick out their clothing, even if it looks silly, to encourage their self-expression. This will help them feel confident and unique wherever they go.
00:35:46:21 – 00:36:06:27
Madison
You should also offer opportunities to choose slowly. Introduce your children to the concept of choice. Let them decorate the room or choose their hairstyle by introducing the concept of choice. Your children will learn that they do what they do and do not like, which will help them well. It will help shape their understanding of themselves. As they become adults.
00:36:07:23 – 00:36:36:03
Madison
You can also encourage exploration. It is vitally important to let your children explore their own interests instead of the camps or activities you’ve picked out for them. Find websites and brochures for your kids in a variety of parent approved activities and let them test out what they’re what they’re interested in, whether it be ballet or robotics. They’ll find out their neck better if they decide to go and talk to them about their feet.
00:36:36:04 – 00:36:47:21
Madison
About your feelings as a parent, you are your child’s biggest role model in life. Teach your children about healthy self-expression by discussing your emotions and why you’re feeling sad, mad, or glad.
00:36:48:06 – 00:37:07:21
Joseph
So we’ve done a few of these things, right? So we’ve been character exploration, especially through the the summer camp program, the online summer camp program and stuff. You got to pick out what camps you wanted to do. We even did a couple of science experiments at home that we we picked up that we thought you’d like.
00:37:07:26 – 00:37:08:07
Madison
Yeah.
00:37:08:28 – 00:37:15:27
Joseph
I’m a choice. Do we give you your your your choice in and how you live your life and decorate your room and stuff?
00:37:16:13 – 00:37:24:08
Madison
I mean, yeah, you guys have allowed me to kind of like, pick what I want in my room, how I want to style it.
00:37:24:12 – 00:37:26:18
Joseph
Even that shelf that I keep banging my head on.
00:37:28:05 – 00:37:30:07
Madison
I mean, technically, you guys put that up.
00:37:30:08 – 00:37:32:02
Joseph
So we put the right. But I mean.
00:37:32:02 – 00:37:37:12
Madison
Like, I would have I would but I do like the shelf because it gives me more.
00:37:37:12 – 00:37:40:28
Joseph
Room. But you would have picked a different place sort of back my head every time you leave your room.
00:37:41:07 – 00:37:41:19
Madison
Yeah.
00:37:41:21 – 00:37:46:14
Joseph
I appreciate that. What about your clothing? Do we allow you to pick your clothing now?
00:37:46:25 – 00:37:47:25
Madison
Yeah, at this point.
00:37:48:24 – 00:37:55:10
Joseph
And how about emphasizing through the arts the mommy daddy, encourage your art Yeah.
00:37:55:11 – 00:38:00:05
Madison
You, in fact, do give me good, constructive criticism when I show you my art saying.
00:38:00:06 – 00:38:04:21
Joseph
Let’s even go so far as to make demands of you to produce art for different shows now.
00:38:04:26 – 00:38:08:20
Madison
I mean, yeah. Speaking of which one, we can do that.
00:38:08:23 – 00:38:11:28
Joseph
Well, you know, that’s. That’s for Christmas, so we’ll get to it.
00:38:12:02 – 00:38:12:13
Madison
Yep.
00:38:13:11 – 00:38:16:19
Joseph
What about talking about your feelings? Um.
00:38:17:19 – 00:38:23:26
Madison
Yeah, you definitely let me. Especially around sixth grade, you let me express what my emotions were.
00:38:24:08 – 00:38:50:13
Joseph
Yeah, that’s. I think that’s a big thing from a psychology school standpoint. You need the freedom to express yourself by talking. A lot of times, you don’t need anyone to say anything Sometimes just talking helps, you know, mommy and daddy or tend to be here to maybe guide the conversation and maybe ask questions. That probably need answers. And those answers can only come from you.
00:38:51:17 – 00:39:17:02
Joseph
So you don’t really need a lot of input from us. We’re certainly not going to solve the problems for you. But the ability to talk and have someone to talk to was really one of the biggest things that I found to be a helpful form of self-expression. Anything else that that self-expression does for you or hints about self-expression or things that parents can do to help their kids?
00:39:17:23 – 00:39:41:07
Madison
I guess for parents, a lot of it is kind of just to help support them, but guide them rightfully. I definitely don’t think that they should they shouldn’t be monitored because some self-expression can be dangerous, but also don’t guide them to a fault.
00:39:41:16 – 00:40:09:19
Joseph
You know, don’t smother them, right? Yeah. Yeah. And I think the other thing is parents parents kind of need to be open minded. Mm hmm. A lot of parents and I fall into this myself. A lot of parents want to raise their kids based on how they were raised. And our parents tried to do the same thing. And as kids, we can all remember, you know, realizing, you know, our parents just don’t get it.
00:40:09:19 – 00:40:33:08
Joseph
It’s different now than when they were kids and so forth. And the fact of the matter is, it is you know, it’s different being a kid today, whether it’s because of the technology today, like when I was your age, the Internet didn’t exist. Mm hmm. So all the stuff that you’re exposed to on the Internet, some good a lot of it bad was never something my parents had to worry about.
00:40:34:06 – 00:40:55:24
Joseph
You know, I was into what at the time were called devices, bulletin board services where you would dial into another computer and do stuff that was basically the equivalent of our Internet. When my parents said that they never even had that level of technology. So my parents could not relate to me from a technology standpoint. So it changes.
00:40:55:24 – 00:41:17:16
Joseph
So I think it’s very important for parents to be open minded, be cautious. There’s a lot of stuff out there today that’s dangerous to the kids grandkids. I think there’s far more danger to kids today than there was when I was a kid. Mm hmm. Society is very different, so we can’t lose sight of that. But you’re right.
00:41:17:16 – 00:41:44:26
Joseph
We can’t smother the kids. We want to protect them. Our job is to protect our kids, to educate our kids and to care for our kids. Sometimes that requires us to have an open mind. It requires us to trust our kids that I have to trust that we’ve taught you right from wrong. And there’s going to come a time where you’re going to have to make that right or wrong choice.
00:41:45:17 – 00:42:05:04
Joseph
And I have to have faith in you that you’re going to make the right choice. You know, and we do that by explaining what the consequences are of both of those choices. I try to provide you with as much information as you possibly can. So you can make an educated choice. I can’t make the choice for you. And a lot of parents want to do that.
00:42:05:27 – 00:42:28:15
Joseph
You know, a lot of parents live vicariously through their kids and dictate their kids lives, and that’s not good for them either. You start in my opinion, it may work for some people, but in my experience, it’s never the best So keep an open mind. Be there, support your kids and allow them to express themselves and see where it goes.
00:42:28:25 – 00:42:29:03
Madison
Yeah.
00:42:31:05 – 00:42:35:28
Joseph
That’s all we have for today. We’ll be back in a minute to get your closing thoughts and shout outs.
00:42:36:02 – 00:42:36:11
Madison
All right.
00:42:37:03 – 00:42:38:20
Joseph
Actually, less than a minute that’s alive.
00:42:44:20 – 00:43:12:11
Madison
All right. So to everyone out there, I just wanted to say that self-expression is pretty important. Having your kids know what they like and don’t like and just figuring out what hobbies they want is really important, especially in developing themselves as a person. And while, yes, you should help to guide them you should also, like we said before.
00:43:12:12 – 00:43:17:25
Madison
Keep an open mind. Still allow them to express themselves just in a healthy manner.
00:43:18:13 – 00:43:21:22
Joseph
Okay. Sage advice, as always.
00:43:21:22 – 00:43:22:10
Madison
Thank you.
00:43:23:02 – 00:43:47:22
Joseph
That was all we had today. Before we do go, though, I want to want to invite our listening and viewing audience once more. To subscribe to the podcast, you can get audio versions of this podcast. Listeners Insights into teens. Video versions of the podcast can be found listed as insights in the things we’re available on Pandora, Castro, Stitcher, Pod Bean, Bud, Sprout, Amazon, anywhere you get a podcast these days.
00:43:48:15 – 00:44:16:23
Joseph
I would also invite you to write in contacts, give us your feedback, give us your show suggestions. You’re you can email us your comments and insights into things dot com. We’re on Twitter at Insights underscore things. You can find high rise versions of all of our videos on YouTube at YouTube.com and flash insights in the things we do stream five days a week on Twitch and Twitch, dot TV’s insights into things.
00:44:17:15 – 00:44:30:07
Joseph
Audio versions can be found on the web at podcast, starting insights into teens. And you can find all this and much more on our official website at insights into things that come and you.
00:44:30:26 – 00:44:40:08
Madison
Don’t forget to check out our other two podcasts, insights and Entertainment hosted by you and Mommy and Insights. And tomorrow our monthly podcast hosted by you and my brother Sam.
00:44:40:12 – 00:44:41:10
Joseph
That’s it. Another one of the.
00:44:41:10 – 00:44:42:14
Madison
Books by me, one.
00:44:42:15 – 00:44:43:01
Joseph
By.